Self Awareness, How We Have Wrongly Defined the Good and the Bad
As a kid, I grew up learning how certain things are good and certain things are bad, as defined by the culture I live in. My family upbringing, which in turn was heavily influenced by the culture we belong to would have predefined sets of values and virtues, classified clearly in the baskets of the good and the bad.
I was fed on these truths till I grew into as a socially myopic teen, a personality who had clear sense of right and wrong, based on the little knowledge I knew, and the day came when I was exposed fully to the power of the internet. The overwhelming information it brought was crippling. Everywhere I looked, I could clearly witness that one culture’s virtues can be considered an anomaly in another’s. But it was not until I became lost in the new world that I discovered the truth, the truth that good and bad is a myth, for nothing can be clearly separated into such classifications.
And this realization, brought me greater understanding of how different lives revolve around me and sets me up, for an extraordinary self awareness.
Good or Bad, Depends on Our Values
Our values as young members of the society are shaped from our upbringing and culture surrounding us, and it is easy to understand how our values affect our judgment of different things. Imagine living in a culture where alcohol consumption is labelled as bad, imagine living in a culture so conservative that nightlife is considered a vice. Unthinkable? Think again, I lived in such a culture once.
I grew up into thinking these are indeed bad habits that I should not even try. Yet, the moment I first tasted breaking these rules, I found new perspectives in life, that, good or bad really depends on my personal values.
Were I to do something in line with my value, I will deem it good. In contrast, the opposite will also be true.
And how many different cultures and subcultures do we have in this world? And within each subcultures, how many people will share similar values while differentiating themselves with certain values unique to themselves? Unfortunately, we have no general consensus done on this aspect, but if I were to guess it, it would be plenty.
And this is precisely the point, when someone else tells us, this is good, and that is bad, do we ask them, from whose perspectives do you see it? What is your personal values that allow you to deduce these definitions of good and bad? Does it align with ours? We probably never thought to ask these questions. And we probably are guilty of not questioning the same questions when reading these materials.
In our journey to become better people in life, we often get confused and dysfunctional, because we put too much weight on the good and bad that is based on others’ definition. But have we truly found these definitions in our very own terms?
Good or Bad, Depends on Our Circumstances
As human beings, we are constantly exposed to externalities that alter our circumstances, both positive and negative.
Every single day, we experience something different, no matter how minute, and with time, these experiences build into our reality, forming our circumstances as a person.
And it is perhaps not a surprise that these circumstances can turn us into a bitter or a cheerful person, an open minded or a conservative person, and a wise or a broken person.
A bitter person tend to see the bad in many things, whereas a cheerful person may see excessive good in everything. A truly open minded person tend to be able to view things from multiple angles, only to get confused from the many conflicting thoughts, whereas a conservative person would likely be guilty of standing firm on whatever beliefs they have, failing to accept new ideas in the process. And really, these persona that form within us thanks to our circumstances will change us into either a wise or a broken person, depending on how we see the numerous truths as good or bad.
Good or Bad, Depends on Our Decoding Mechanism
Values and circumstances however, are not the only reason why we see good and bad differently, in truth, these are merely two factors that contribute to our decoding mechanism. And our decoding mechanism, evolves as we experience more in life, as we begin to accept more reality that is outside of our own, and assimilate those reality into our library of tools to decode the meaning of good and bad, in the world anew.
And as our decoding mechanism evolves, the meaning of good and bad itself become blurred as we find ways to go beyond the fallacy of good and bad and instead, learn to see the truth where a good experience can have both its good side and bad side, and the same rules holds true for any bad experience.
The onus to define good and bad lies in our own hands
The Thin Line Separating Good and Bad Has Blurred
We, who pursue self awareness as part of our lives, should understand that the good and the bad can no longer be clearly discerned like a particle science, and with so much knowledge out there that we can assimilate into our mind to form different perspectives on different matters, we are rapidly being thrust into a world where we get to decide how we define good and bad, with the ultimate intention to grow into better people.
We excel when we see the good in good, the bad in bad, the good in bad, and the bad in good