The Moms and Dads of America Have Had Enough
A look at parenthood in the 2020s.
He told her she wasn’t going to get the job, despite being the most qualified. Then he explained why. “I’ve been looking at your Facebook page,” he said. “You’re too devoted to your family.”
My friend quelled her rage.
“I’m already doing this job at another university,” she said.
He shrugged.
“True, but this place kills you with work. I don’t think it would be a good fit. You’d be happier someplace else.” It was an interesting move, framing a potential lawsuit in terms of her happiness.
My friend decided to let it go. She’s remained at smaller universities, doing an excellent job for which she’s paid less money. Her reputation as a great mom gets in the way of her career. It looks like a liability to bosses who would expect her to live in her office, taking work home with her on the weekends. It doesn’t matter if parenting has imbued her with leadership skills. They don’t care if she can get twice as much done as her colleagues because she knows how to use spreadsheets and productivity tools.
They don’t see her that way.
Once you have kids, your workplace suddenly becomes obsessed with physically seeing you work. If you’re not at the…
