What Can You Control in Your Life to Experience More Love, Happiness, and Freedom?
How to get clarity about what you can influence in your own life and why that matters.
Until I was in my early 30s, I used to believe that I could not control my emotions, in particular my anger. I believed that my anger (my reactions) was caused by someone else, and therefore someone else was to blame for how I felt (and how I reacted). In other words, I thought the world was against me and that I was a victim.
Let me share an example. It’s one I’m not proud of, but it makes the point. Towards the end of my second long-term relationship, my partner and I got into an argument. I became so enraged that I smashed his non-stick frying pan on the stove and did a darn good job of damaging it. I blamed him for my anger at that moment because I was over-hungry and in the middle of trying to make dinner when he launched into an argument with me.
After years of studying personal development and observing my thoughts and word choices in representing my feelings, I realized I was unconsciously giving away my power and control. My world view had been, “Me against the world.” One of the lessons I learned from that awful argument (admittedly not until some time later) was that I never wanted to get that angry…
