“You’ve Got a Friend in Me”-Why Everyone Needs a Friend
7 reasons to cultivate and make friendship a priority today.
“Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty counsel.”-Proverbs 27:9
Don’t underestimate the healing power of a true friendship.
In life we rely a lot on our families, our jobs, our work, our accomplishments and our personal strengths. But finding a friend that you can call on, day or night, is a gift I believe every human should have. It is a gift to seek out, nurture, build and treasure for a lifetime.
A phone call to a friend can be your strength on a day when nothing seems to go right. An encouraging card or letter from a friend can be the source of comfort or encouragement you crave. A friend may be just what you need.
Here are 7 reasons I urge you to go out and find a friend, nurture an existing friendship, or be a friend to someone today.
1. A support frame outside your family.
Family, for a lot of people, is their number one priority, their most treasured gift in life, and their source of support and comfort. But there may come a time in your life when you don’t have family near you, you are in a riff with someone in your family that normally has your back, or worst-case scenario, a family member that is no longer with you. This is where a good friend can be a lifesaver. It can be an extremely comforting source to have a friend to reach out to when you are far from family, going through interfamilial problems or just missing companionship. Friends are good at getting you through tough stuff.
2. Friends offer a different kind of love.
The love of a mom or a dad, or a brother or a sister is unique. The love of a husband or wife is unique. So can be said for the love of a friend. Friendship is distinct in that there is no blood tie, there is no committed union of wedding, it is a voluntary, unbound continuous act of being there for another human being. Being there can mean calling each other once a week to check in, emailing every month, weekend get togethers, or catching up after several months have gone by. There is no set standard of what a friendship has to be for each. It is what you individually make it. That is what makes it so beautiful and unique.
3. A friend can be a sounding board for the things you can’t share with your family.
One of the greatest benefits, in my opinion, of having a good friend, is the ability to share with this friend things that you may find difficult to share or understand through family members. This could be a problem that you are having with another family member that you want an outside perspective on, it could be an intrapersonal element that you feel more comfortable talking to a pal rather than a blood relative, or it could just be the ability to share openly and know someone shares in your sentiments.
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”-C.S. Lewis
4. A friend can be the break you need from routine.
When I think of a friend, I think of someone who always has my back, someone who listens to me, laughs with me, and shares some interests with me, but I also think of someone to have an adventure with. Sometimes you need that person to go skydiving with, that person to call at midnight and give you advice, that person to help you finally do something you have been afraid to do. Friends are awesome at not only being supportive and sharing, but great for riding the adventure of life, for laughter and enjoyment and just being yourself. Next time life hands you lemons, try calling a friend.
5. Having a friend can literally make you healthier.
Having positive, loving relationships through family can definitely help you feel less lonely, more connected, more responsible and even urge you to take better care of yourself. But friends can also play just as big a role in helping you stay fit, helping keep your mind young, and ultimately living longer. In high school, friends are the ones who encouraged me to try out for the soccer team or go to that summer training camp for soccer. In college, it was my roommate that would pump me up with encouragement as we go jogging and start a new workout schedule together. Friends can not only improve your mood and mental health but they can be an impetus for improving physical health as well.
6. Friends offer different perspectives.
I can recall being at a childhood friend’s house for dinner and realizing it was so different than what my family did. The food was different, the atmosphere was different, the discussion and way of relating to one another was different. It was eye opening to see how another family had dinner. And that is just dinner! Friendships allow room for building and keeping an open mind. Understanding differences in one another that shape who we are and who we become. Often, in a family setting, we may take on the same views and beliefs our family sets around us. Friends that live life a different way through different raisings can offer unique perspectives that open our hearts and minds.
7. Friends help us become better communicators.
We are relational creatures built for relationship with one another. Friendship, like any relationship, requires reciprocity. We want to be comforted or supported by friends and likewise they probably want the same in return. Friends are great at teaching us how to become more open with expressing ourselves in a kind way. For most people, I think we often treat friends better than family. Learning to work through a fight with a friend or tell them your honest thoughts are perfect places for us to learn how to be better communicators with everyone in our life.
Concluding Thoughts
While it may seem quite obvious that it is good to have a friend, I wanted to write about friendship this week as a reminder to make it a priority in your life. Whether it is realizing you need to put more effort into developing a friendship, finding a group to get involved with to meet new people, or just checking in on friend you already have. Go be a friend to someone today, we all need one.
