Spirit of Halloween’s Website is Wonderfully Weird

Hey, um, your website is pretty weird. Let’s begin with the section called “Articles and How To.” This is an actual sentence from that section:

To make that pirate costume idea, how about an old blouse and some of that old costume jewelry gift idea?

What the hell does that mean? First of all, you’re not making a pirate costume idea. You’re making a pirate costume. And what is “costume jewelry gift idea?” I bet you don’t understand it either. You know why? It doesn’t make any damned sense.

Something else that’s strange is your “Social Responsibility” section. Here’s an excerpt:

Spirit of Halloween supports the right of all individuals to be free from slavery in the workplace.

I mean, don’t get me wrong. It’s great that you’re anti-slavery. I’m pretty positive every rational human being is. But, if you’ll take a gander at other corporate websites, you’re pretty much the only one pointing this little factoid out. But, hey, while you’re at it, why not list some other completely obvious things you and everyone else are against? Maybe put up a section about how you’re against child abuse? Or domestic violence? Or, say, punching old people in the face? I guess if you were a “costume idea,” you’d be Captain Obvious?

Speaking of costumes, you have one called “Sub in Training” — sub as in subordinate, as in S&M. Here’s how you describe the costume:

Bondage and Discipline, Sadism and Masochism add up to BDSM. Maybe that’s the new math. All we know is that the adult women’s Sub in Training tee is easy to put on and take off.

I think I speak for everyone when I say what the fuck? And I think we can all agree that BDSM is NOT the new math.

Strangely enough, I checked your “Job Opportunities” section and did not see Website Editor listed.