At risk for an arranged marriage
Unless I want to try love again
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Breaking up
- with a school or college friend messes with the circle
- when in grad school means living and moving in territories
- with a colleague messes with your 9–6
- with an ex-colleague?…or a friend’s friend? I don’t know
To be with someone seriously, and then fail in private seems near impossible.
The thought’s been bumming me out.
It looks like an excuse to not put myself out there. But it also looks like an exercise to see if love without the messy-breakup gamble is possible somewhere.
Stated as click-bait — ‘Is there a smart way to get a serious date?’
Love hasn’t been a priority at the moment. Though I’m worried it won’t ever be, without me answering ‘What if it’s a break-up again?’
It’s a common dissatisfaction. With most of our careers nearly sorted, an arranged marriage is a common worry. Just getting it out the way.
There is however a point of gratitude.
From college, I’ve learnt to tell the qualities I definitely don’t want in a partner. Most importantly, that I shouldn’t get in hoping to change somebody. And that red flags are red flags and will bring the house down.
So today, with worries in mind, I’m grateful to the learnings from my previous relationship — not the person, just the relationship — and I offer it flowers from a distance without disturbing it.
