002 — art

“We’d sink into our seats right as they dimmed out all the lights, the Technicolor world made out of music and machine…”

To make the intangible tangible. To bring nonbeing into being. Isn’t that what everything is about?

I think nothing feels so fulfilling for me as the bringing of nonbeing into being in the form of art.

The notes of instruments and the harmony of voices pouring into your ears, the whirling colors of twirling skirts swirling before your eyes, the flickering shapes and lines of limber bodies infused with choreography, the delightful rhythm of language. A tap-tap-tap on your heart, chills down your spine, heartstrings in vibrato. Your being filled with intangible weight.

I don’t understand “lust of the flesh.” I suffer from lust of the senses. I want all my senses aroused at once. I want more than the feeling of flesh. I want feelings!

alignment of desire and aesthetic action

I read this in an academic paper on hip-hop dance. Alignment of desire and aesthetic action: the site of transformation, when the pleasure of the dance becomes palpable.

Sometimes I listen to a song and all I know is desire so fierce, as if a heavy bird is trapped inside my ribcage, pounding against my bones to burst free.

Desire not for anything in particular, but for this intangible thing contained inside me, this thing in nonbeing, to explode into being.

There is only one way I know: fill the room with the music. Drown myself in it. Let it come to be in movement, perfect movement, synchronized movement, beautiful movement, melt into movement, my body, my self, transforming into something fluid, made up not of flesh, but whatever thing the music is made of too. Unprecedented alignment of desire, intention, and action.

It feels so damn good.

Defy space. Defy time. Defy entropy. Fight with Creation. Bring nonbeing into being.

For just because it is not tangible, doesn’t mean it’s not real.

“Thank you for making my dreams into reality.”