Let’s Learn by Example
Meetings are the worst. Well, most of them. I’m betting most of them could have been an email.
But even in the important ones, I have a horrible time retaining information — even if I’m giving it my full attention. Confession time: In a previous job, I’d often go back to my desk to try to make heads or tails out of a discovery meeting with a client (where I supposedly got the idea of what it is they need and proposed some ideas so that I can develop a project and, you know, keep my job), with no idea what was really said or what to do next.
And while I’d paid attention and taken notes, my attention span and short-term memory are apparently really short and my notes weren’t detailed enough to be helpful. I’d then have to casually introduce the fact that I wasn’t paying enough attention in the meeting to the project manager.
Last night, I was finishing up Jerrad Lopes’s latest book, Dad Tired. It’s a book for dads who want to lead their families in being more like Jesus. It’s a great book, but I was already familiar with several of the key points he made in it because I listen to his podcast (which has the same name). So, as I read, I was looking for the nuances that were new or that I had forgotten from the podcast.
In the last couple chapters, there were some great concepts that (I thought) were highly impactful. I’m going to start applying these immediately, I thought. Fast forward to this morning, and I can’t remember a single one.
It’s a well-written, easy-flowing book, and his perspective is valuable. I really felt as I read that I was learning a lot. So why couldn’t I remember anything?
Turns out I have the same problem as I read that I do in important meetings. I didn’t write a thing down as I read, so I forgot it all. My brain chose not to retain the ideas.
You may or may not have this problem, but I am willing to bet most of us have some kind of stumbling block when we learn. Maybe it’s a lack of time to try to learn new things. It could be that you’re focused on only helping others learn, instead of learning yourself.
The importance of our roles as Learner-In-Chief
But one of the “hats” we wear as dads should be that of Chief Learner. We ought to lead our wives and kids by example when it comes to learning about Jesus. Our family — especially our kids — will be less inclined to learn when they don’t see us actively engaged in it. So what do we do?
The first thing is to figure out your weak spots. For me, that means I need to be cognizant of the fact that Barack Obama, Tim Duncan, Bill Gates, Tim Keller, or Tony Dungy could be speaking right in front of me and I’d forget it tomorrow.
Ask for help and then be diligent in addressing the issue
If you’re not sure what your weak spot is when it comes to processing new information and learning, ask someone who can already see it. It could be your spouse, your professor, or someone at work. And once you know your weak spot, attack it.
This afternoon, I went back to the book and scanned what I read last night, looking for familiar phrases. I found the points that had been so impactful and wrote down keywords and page numbers, then underlined them in the book. Boom. I have the page number and the jist of what stuck out to me — now all I have to do is go to the book and re-read the passage.
When I start applying this same method to other important books — the Bible, for one — I’m going to get a lot more value out of it. I can constantly refer back to the concept God showed me in that book at that conference, and keep going back to reflect on it and pray through it, rather than letting it slip through the cracks.
What’s the thing that keeps you from retaining the information God wants you to start applying?
