Being authentic and kind reveals the real you
Authenticity and kindness are Cherylyn “Cj” Jones’ trademarks, which have come in handy professionally and personally.
The in-house social media specialist for SiteLock, for more than seven years she was part of the social media team at GoDaddy. Jones is an award-winning podcaster and former “mommy-blogger.”
She talked with sales and marketing expert Aaron Kilby about how her love of all things related to social media keeps her engaged and happy to help others achieve their online goals.
Authenticity and kindness are part and parcel of social media, which is how most people get to know you on the internet. First, be authentic. Any act will eventually come out. If you’re a good person, kindness will show through.
“It’s imperative that I communicate via social in a way that still tells people who I am and that I care,” Jones said. “It’s not always easy to do without physical queues.
“If I’m communicating with customers or influencers, I need them to know they are important to me,” she said.
Being authentic takes the least amount of work and thinking. If you’re lazy, authenticity is the way to go.
“It can be challenging to being authentic in that you still — depending who you are — might need a filter,” Jones said. “As a mommy blogger giving advice, I was a bit more reserved.
“However, being myself is easier, requires less filtering and — honestly — is just more believable,” she said. “When you’re being true to yourself, your job, communication and overall well-being is just healthier and happier. People can and will notice the difference.”
Beware of TMI
Sharing on social media is good. However, too much information can either build deep relationships or backfire.
“You have to know which side of the line you’re on, depending who you’re talking with,” Jones said. “When I worked at GoDaddy, my nickname was ‘Overshare.’ I’m a chatterbox.”
Empathy helps communication tremendously online or off.
“When working with people in any way, empathy can help you communicate better,” Jones said. “It brings a sense of understanding and caring to every conversation. Just remember, you can’t save everyone.”
If you master writing the way you talk, your passion will come through, which helps customers relax and listen as you have conversations with them.
“Customers always need to be heard,” Jones said. “Practicing thoughtful kindness immediately helps. If you start any communication remembering to be kind, social or otherwise, you’ll be in a better place to listen and assist.”
Representing a brand, you should have entered the arrangement based on mutual visions and goals. That makes authenticity a natural state of affairs rather than a masquerade party.
“It’s important to know the message your business is conveying,” Jones said. “Then put that into your own words. I also believe in signing my own name, even if I’m repping the company — always taking responsibility for what I’m saying.
“I do social on behalf of the company and on my personal account both,” she said. “Absolutely.”
Speak to relate
When you speak to different audiences, adjust your presentation to speak “their language.” That doesn’t change who you are or what you say. You express yourself authentically in the way they can relate to and understand.
“I’d like to think I’m my authentic self at all times,” Jones said. “I don’t really change it up for different people unless I know them personally. It goes back to kindness and treating everyone with the same kind of respect. That’s more how I roll.”
The challenge is when you encounter people who are happy when they’re unhappy.
“That can be a strugglebus for everyone,” Jones said. “Negativity is sometimes the biggest enemy. You just do your best to keep on looking up.”
There’s no rule you have to respond to someone being angry toward you on social media. As a lover of social orders, let your crickets speak for you.
“There will always be trolls,” Jones said. “However, it’s important to know that just because someone is angry, it doesn’t mean they are trolling. I would not respond to threats or personal attacks. I respond to anger with as much understanding and empathy as possible.
“Letting people know they are heard and that it’s understood they are frustrated can go a long way in helping to resolve an issue,” she said. “Just like being on the phone with them, some ‘yell’ on social media. It’s OK to hear them out before addressing concerns.”
Let situations or negative media that you can’t control go their own way. Being an oasis of authenticity and kindness isn’t such a bad gig.
“It can be daunting,” Jones said. “Sometimes you can step away, but that isn’t always possible when it’s your job.
“Always focus on that real person on the other side of the conversation you’re having,” she said. “If necessary, read your response three or four times out loud before sending.”
About The Author
Jim Katzaman is a manager at Largo Financial Services and worked in public affairs for the Air Force and federal government. You can connect with him on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.

