How to Start a FWB Arrangement

Josh Noah
DateHug
Published in
7 min readOct 31, 2023

There are many types of relationships in the world of modern dating. Being in a long-term, committed relationship isn’t the only option for people interested in dating — there are all kinds of fun and exciting relationship dynamics to explore.

One of the more unique types of modern relationships is the friends with benefits (FWB) arrangement. Made popular in TV shows and movies, a FWB arrangement involves two friends getting together to enjoy casual fun without any long-term commitments.

It’s a fun and fresh way to date, especially for people that aren’t interested in a traditional relationship. However, finding FWB arrangements isn’t always easy. Despite being more popular than ever, not everyone knows how to find someone that wants to start a friends with benefits arrangement.

So, we’ve created a handy guide that covers all the important information that you need to know to find a FWB arrangement!

What is a FWB Arrangement?

As the name suggests, a friends with benefits arrangement is a type of relationship involving two friends with additional benefits. The main ‘benefits’ of the arrangement are that you get to enjoy casual fun with each other without any emotional or romantic commitments.

While the specific dynamics of FWB arrangements vary, most involve having no-strings relationship over a certain period. FWB arrangements can be short or long-term and can happen with friends you’ve known for a long time or have only recently met.

In any case, a friends with benefits arrangement is about having fun while avoiding any of the romantic complexities of a relationship. It’s about having no-strings fun with a friend that you enjoy hanging with — but without any emotional baggage!

How to Find a FWB Arrangement

Are you struggling to find a FWB arrangement where you live? While it’s a popular type of relationship, not everyone knows where to find friends with benefits arrangement.

Maybe all your friends are in relationships, or you’d prefer FWB with a new friend. No matter the situation, we’ve got some suggestions to help you find the perfect FWB arrangement for your unique situation:

FWB Sites and Apps

One of the easiest ways to find a FWB benefits arrangement online is dating sites and apps. There are plenty of dating apps and sites worth checking out, from dedicated FWB dating sites to general dating apps like Tinder.

For example, FWBdatingonly.com is a dating website that is specifically for people seeking friends with benefits. People using the website are actively searching for FWB, so you don’t need to worry about misleading someone over your intentions.

Traditional dating apps like Tinder.com and OKCupid.com are also a good place for finding a FWB arrangement. The main appeal of these apps is their popularity, with millions of active users, helping increase the chance of finding FWB.

However, traditional dating apps also have people that are seeking traditional relationships. So, you might need to use filters to find people that are exclusively seeking friends with benefits, while being clear about your intentions to avoid miscommunications.

So, we always suggest checking out dedicated FWB dating sites first, as you know everyone there is looking for the same thing you are!

Social Media

Another great place to find FWB online is social media. After all, you already have friends on social media sites like Facebook and Instagram, so it makes sense to check them out to see if anyone is interested in starting a FWB arrangement!

For example, why not look over your friends lists on Facebook to see if anyone you know is single? If you spot someone that is, start chatting to them to get the ball rolling.

Plus, social media platforms have millions of daily users, so there is a good chance some of these people are looking for a friends with benefits arrangement!

You can also use hashtags and search features to help you find people that are looking for FWB online. Lots of people use FWB hashtags, so consider searching these to see if anyone is looking for FWB near you.

Social Events and Leisure Activities

While dating apps make it easier to find FWB online, it’s also possible to find FWB offline too.

Social events are a good place to start looking for FWB offline, giving the chance to meet new people with similar interests. By meeting in person, you have a great chance to chat and build a strong friendship, providing the perfect platform for a friends with benefit arrangement in the future.

For example, if you love sports then consider joining a local sports club or checking out a game. Book lovers could join a book group, while you can also look for activity groups based on any of your hobbies, whether it’s photography, travel, hiking, film, or theater.

Some Tips and Rules

Once you find someone interested in becoming friends with benefits, it’s important to set some ground rules to ensure everyone knows what to expect. Here are some important rules and tips for anyone starting a FWB relationship:

Always Set Ground Rules

Before any of the fun stuff begins, you need to set ground rules so that everyone is happy with how the FWB arrangement will work.

You both need to establish what’s ok in your FWB relationship, including everything from sex and foreplay to what should be off limits.

For example, you’re both ok having sex but might want to avoid cuddling or kissing once you’ve had sex. These are often considered romantically intimate, so may be best left out of your FWB dynamic.

Other common rules include no exclusivity and generally avoiding anything deemed too romantic.

Be Honest

Always make sure you’re both honest about what you want from your arrangement.

In most cases, it’s just about enjoying casual fun with someone you like and are comfortable around. Make it clear that neither of you wants anything serious or romantic, and you want to avoid the complexities that come with a relationship.

FWB should be about having no-strings fun with a good friend, and nothing more.

Establish Boundaries

The best FWB relationships establish clear boundaries for what is and isn’t acceptable during the arrangement. These should include physical boundaries, including what you’re both happy to do sexually, along with some emotional and social boundaries.

For example, you might want to consider avoiding talking about your situation with other people or on social media. Maybe you don’t post photos together or tell your connected social group about the arrangement.

Of course, everyone has unique boundaries for their FWB relationship, so it’s important to discuss these to ensure everyone is comfortable going forward.

Never Start FWB With Someone You Have Feelings For

This may seem obvious, but you should always avoid starting a FWB relationship with someone you already have feelings for. FWB is about having casual fun with no-strings attached. As soon as someone gets emotionally attached, the entire arrangement falls apart, with one person usually getting hurt.

Never go into FWB hoping that it might blossom into something serious. While these situations can happen, it’s never a guarantee and only increases the chances of you getting hurt. In most cases, FWB relationships are temporary, so don’t make the mistake thinking your arrangement will be any different.

Choose the Right Partner

Following on from the point above, you should always choose the right person to be your friend with benefits. Never choose someone that you have feelings for, instead opting for someone that you like as a friend and nothing more.

Obviously, there should be a physical attraction, but avoid someone that you have any emotional connection to. Also, you want to find someone that can be open and honest about a FWB relationship without any expectations.

Remember, there’s a chance the situation might not end well, so consider what type of impact this could have on an existing friendship. Do you want to jeopardize a long-lasting friendship for a short period of casual fun?

Always choose your partner wisely, otherwise your FWB experience may not be the best.

No Sleepovers

A simple but effective tip for FWB is to avoid sleepovers.

It’s always best to leave once you’ve had sex and avoid anything too intimate like cuddling and kissing. While it may seem enjoyable, these intimate moments are best left for a serious relationship rather than a friend with benefits.

If you share too much intimacy with your friend with benefits, it could lead one of you to start developing serious feelings. Keep things casual and avoid sleepovers!

Keep Dating Other People

One of the best parts of a friends with benefits arrangement is that you can both keep dating other people. So, don’t make the mistake of being exclusive to your FWB and continue to see other people during your time together!

Whether you’re looking for a serious relationship at the same time or want to enjoy casual fun with lots of people, we always suggest you maintain a healthy dating life. In fact, you may find that having FWB helps better prepare you for more serious dating, taking a lot of pressure off your dating expectations.

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Josh Noah
DateHug

You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.