March 2024. The American Way of Death by Jessica Mitford
1963, Doubleday Publishing Group, 359 pages. Written in English, read in English.
A disclaimer, first. The version of the book I’ve read is called The American Way of Death Revisited. Generally, when a revised edition of a book is published, it retains the same name. However here, it appears that this version of the book, completed by Mitford in 1996 — shortly before she and her family have become themselves clients of the industry described in the book, has contained so many changes, that it warranted a complete name change. Its core message and its prose, at least according to the introduction, have remained the same.
At the occasion of a loved one’s death, the bereaved have to contend with two things in parallel — on one track there is the fresh grief, sometimes the shock, always the acceptance of a major life change; on the other track, all of the logistical details that have to do with the final farewell from, and rest of, the deceased — funeral, interment, cremation. The bridge between these two tracks is built and maintained by the funeral directors, who help the mourning family take care of the latter logistical details, but exploit them based on the grief and confusion that they have to contend with as part of the first track. This is, at least, the gist of The American Way of Death in the eyes of the funeral directors industry, which causes the book and its author, as she describes in the introduction to the revised edition, to be automatically branded as heretics, bitter enemies of the trade.
The truth, as always, is much more nuanced. Having rebranded from undertakers to funeral directors over the second half of the 20th century, the members of the funeral and interment industry have a thankless task — they are service providers at a particular time that is inevitable for every family, a time in which the potential clients are the most sensitive; but they are also business owners and operators, in a business in which the bottom line is still something to be taken into consideration. This cannot be a context within which funeral directors can easily appear benevolent in any way.
Add to that the general direction of capitalism and consumerism — as with every industry in America, business is moving in a single direction from many small establishments to few large conglomerates that operate franchises; and everything that is implied — quotas, profitability, alignment with a central line of service — make the image of the industry even more difficult to maintain in a positive light.
Jessica Mitford navigates this terrain with a simple premise that she is trying to explore — why, how, and when had the simple service of putting a deceased loved one to rest, become so complicated and so expensive? During her research, she uncovers some trade secrets, explaining how funeral directors navigate potential customers towards higher priced purchases; how funeral directors obfuscate the actual cost of specific line items within a more generalised package; how funeral directors try to make the customers of what should be a single walk-in purchase, repeat customers, and how they persuade them to purchase in advance, services and assets they may only need decades away. Furthermore, she uncovers how the less expensive option of cremation has also become a financial burden on the grieving families. Finally, she explores the conflict between the religious institutions’ view of care for a deceased loved one and their families, and the funeral directors’ view.
The origin story of this book begins with an article. It was written by Roul Tunley in 1961, not by Mitford herself, but it followed both an article written by Mitford and some activity — the founding of a non-profit and the strife to enact new laws, at the state and federal level — by her husband, Robert Treuhaft. When Mitford approached Tunley and suggested that he expand the article to a book, following the surprising success of the article — having struck a nerve in American society — he persuaded her to write the book herself.
One can understand why Mitford herself, and the book that she has written, have become mortal enemies of the funeral and interment industry — at times the prose and the choice of words reflect an unfavourable opinion of the trade and its methods, and it may appear that facts provided in the book correspond with a specific view; but Mitford does not wish to drag the whole industry in the mud. Her point of view is that there is a disease, a blemish, on the industry that is caused by the natural forces of capitalism, and that this disease can be erradicated; she champions the funeral directors who put the welfare of the grieving families at the top of their agenda, and even provides a list of these funeral homes across North America, indexed into states and provinces, for the book’s readers and the funeral homes’ potential future costumers to decide for themselves.
Even some of the funeral directors themselves, as Mitford testifies in the introduction to the book, following her invitation to an industry convention, understand that this book is not a scathing attack on their trade but rather a useful report that can direct them in the right path to find the balance between profit and service, once again.
The April 2024 selection for the David Bowie Book Club will be In Cold Blood by Truman Capote
