Be a better man… than your father.
It is the prayer of every good parent that their children lead better lives than they did. It is in this light that I write this piece.
A while back I was able to take some time off to see some TV series. A friend recommended “Fringe”. Fringe happens to be a great adventure that blew my mind and won’t fade off so easily. It showcased a lot of things I am so interested in, but won’t find in everyday books. Though fictional, it didn’t fail to open my mind to a lot of things I’ve imagined and dreamed of in my growing up as a onetime science student with deep passion in the arts. Fringe was based on a lot of what the common man will call impossibilities.
Before I digress further, I’ll like to state what is so special about this film that struck me and won’t make me forget about the film. In one of the episodes (Entrada, 8th of the 3rd season), one of the lead characters muttered some strange words that have continued to strike in my mind daily. The words: “einai kalytero anthropo apo ton patera toy”. I’ll take it that you don’t speak or understand Greek, so I’ll translate that. It simply means “Be a better man than your father”.
Getting the meaning of the mutterings took me to a whole new thinking realm, it was just like I was told something I had never heard before, and instantly I got this “Aha!” feeling. The feeling you get when you discover something you’ve been searching for.
I must let you know that I have nothing against my own father that will make me go into a head-to-head with him in accomplishments. If there’s one dad I’ll recommend for anyone in the world, it’ll be my dad. Despite his shortcomings he has proven to be Superhuman and I love and will always love him for that.
Truth be told, the facts that I love him so much and he’s a great dad don’t mean he’s all perfect. If each one of us will be honest enough to look into our individual lives we will find that no matter how much the love we have for these parents (Mums inclusive), there are still some things we wish we could just erase.
I did a kind of keen study on my dad, I picked out the aspects I find worthy of emulation and the other aspects I won’t want in my own life as a father-to-be. I did all these, not to spite him, but to make his earnest prayers of us his children becoming better persons come true.
Our parents tried so much in their growing up to become who and what they are today. Not all of them had the opportunities that we have today. Some of them barely went to school; some did with a lot of challenges. No computers like we have now, no internet, minimal pliable roads, some had access to electricity, some didn’t. Most of the luxuries we enjoy today were not there for them then. Some of us are tired of hearing tales they keep telling us, “In my days, I hawked this, I sold that…”
It is a pity that not many in this generation harness the power of all that we have to ourselves today. We prefer to complain about everything not going right. Not all of us take up the responsibility and challenge to push through the storms we face now and balance it with the ample opportunities around us. Until we begin to take charge of the present in preparation for the future, we might just end up living in the shadows of our parents’ achievements.
I have taken it as a challenge to be a better man than my father by avoiding the mistakes he made along his journey, by emulating the good and admirable features of him, by taking on great feats he could not achieve and lastly by being a father that my children will be proud of. I would be counted a successful man when my children surpass me in achievements.
I challenge you today. Be a better man than your Father (and mother, of course)…
P.S: I have several fathers.
First written in August 2013
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Originally published at topazandblogs.wordpress.com on August 30, 2013.