Dear Pregnancy Stalkers, Cut It Out

Just because someone is pregnant doesn’t mean the normal rules of human interaction don’t apply.

My wife is in the final stages of pregancy. We’re having twin girls (Maggie & Lyla) in a few days, in addition to our almost 3-year-old boy Owen.

Pregnancy is a funny thing.

More specifically, people reacting to pregnancy is fascinating.

It’s as if the sight of a pregnant woman suddenly gives you carte blanche to say anything you want…to a complete stranger.

But being pregnant with twins is a whole new ballgame.

Pam has lost count of how many times people have stopped her to ask how many babies she’s having. Total strangers will stop her at the store to ask her if she’s having multiple babies.

Heck, last week we were walking across the road, and a lady stopped her car while driving by (stopped…her car…in the road), rolled down her window and said, “Excuse me. How many babies you got in there?”

Really?!

You’re gonna stop a complete stranger and ask her a very personal question? Just because you’re curious?

I can’t think of another scenario where this is normal.

If I see a really overweight person, I don’t walk up and say, “Gosh, you’re fat. Are you technically morbidly obese? Have you always been overweight? Do you have a medical condition that causes you to gain weight?”

That’s obviously rude.

Then why the heck do people think it’s okay to bombard my sweet pregnant wife with insensitive questions, while all she’s trying to do is make it through another day of being super uncomfortably pregnant?

I know pregnancy is a beautiful, miraculous thing. But next time you feel the urge to stop a complete stranger and ask her about her pregnant belly, here are a few things to consider:

• It’s quite possible that she’s not thrilled about the size of her belly, and it’s likely a source of insecurity for her.
• Yes, there’s a baby growing inside (or in our case, a pair of babies), but the woman carrying these babies is a person, too. Show interest in ALL persons involved, not just the babies.
• If you don’t know the pregnant person in question, think about maybe (oh, I don’t know) NOT saying anything?

I don’t want to sound like a grumpy old fart. We love when our friends and family make a big deal about the babies. But it just gets weird when complete strangers inject themselves into our lives without so much as a “Hey, how ya doin’?”

The best comment my wife has gotten was from a sweet lady at church a few weeks ago. All she said was,

“Great to see you. You look great. That’s all I’m gonna say.”

Well played, Mrs. Judy. Well played.