Should I tell my co-worker he smells?
Dear Dale:
My co-worker smells bad. And not just in summer. Should I say something?
Signed,
Can hardly breathe
Dear CHB:
Absolutely! Take the guy aside and, in a low voice, say: buddy, you reek.
May seem cruel but it’s the best way. For all of you, him including. You think he wants to go through life being a human stink-bomb? Of course not.
Introduce him to the wonders of deodorant. Perhaps he’s never heard of it. Or maybe he’s just one of those guys who’s so immune to his own smell he has no idea what a torture it is to others. Either way, enlighten him.
I should know. My boss has horrifically bad breath. Smells like he ate a turd, threw it up and ate it again. Last year, at the Christmas party, I was his Secret Santa so I gave him a case of Tic Tac. But you think he uses it? Fuck no.
And there’s this guy who sits next to me at the bar on wing night. Always has the whiff of fart about him. You never hear a noise or choke on the smell but it’s always there, like the slow leak of a tire no one fixes.
Turns out he eats beans every day for breakfast. Told him if he didn’t change his diet, I’d ram my beer mug up his ass. The following week he was fart-free.
So do it. Take him aside and tell him the truth. You’ll be glad you did. Because not only will you be able to breathe easy, it’ll dramatically improve his sex life, for which he’ll be eternally grateful. Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Dale
Hi. If you’ve made it this far, you probably liked the story. So why not check out some others at my Medium page? https://medium.com/dear-dale
