Should I send women a picture of my penis?
Dear Dale:
I met this woman online and she seems nice. Should I send her a picture of my penis?
Signed,
Looking to make an impression
Dear LTMAI:
Absolutely. Women want to know. Which is only fair. Call me a feminist if you will but I think women deserve to know how much pork is in the sausage.
It wasn’t always that way. For most of human history, sex was a crapshoot. No matter how tall or muscular the guy, there was always the chance that, when the meat came off the grill, instead of the jumbo frank she was hoping for, the unlucky woman would have to settle for a cocktail weenie.
But then some guy invented the camera. To take pictures of naked women, I’m sure. And so porn was born. But what’s good for the gander is good for the goose and women started demanding dick pics. A couple hundred years later they’re still clamoring for them. So sure, go for it.
Few tips, though. First, be all you can be. Look at porn to maximize both height and girth. Go a couple days without masturbating if you can. A big sacrifice I know but if you really like this woman, you’ll make the effort.
Second, be honest. Don’t resort to tricks. Flattering camera angles or digital enhancement. That will only get you so far. Sooner or later, your pants will come down and the truth will come out. You’re only cheating yourself.
Third, use a ruler. Dick pics can be hard to decipher. Would you buy a map with no scale? Of course not. So be a gentleman: give her a guide. It’ll save her endless hours with a magnifying glass. May seem unimportant to you but it’s the little things that win a woman’s heart.
Finally, do a good job. A lot of guys just aim their phone at their crotch and click. Big mistake. No one likes dimly-lit porn. So why would a woman want a half-assed dick pic? Set up some lights. Find a nice background. Have a friend help you. Maybe even hire a professional. It’s money well spent.
As for when, morning is best. That way she can enjoy it with her breakfast. Nothing puts a smile on a woman’s face like opening her mail and finding a photo of some stranger’s cock.
Remember: women know when we’re trying. So if you’re going to send a picture of your penis, do a good job. You’ll be glad you did. Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Dale
Hi. If you’ve made it this far, you probably liked the story. So why not check out some others at my Medium page? https://medium.com/dear-dale
