What if Helen Keller had been born a man?
Dear Dale:
I saw this movie on the oldies channel last night about some woman named Helen Keller who was blind and deaf but learned to read and write, travelled all around the world, met lots of famous people and wrote a bunch of books. What an amazing woman! What would a guy do in that situation?
Signed,
Wondering
Dear W:
Probably nothing. You have to understand: women are cursed by the need to communicate. Even when they have nothing to say, they still say it.
So, despite being both deaf and blind, Helen Keller still found a way to annoy people with her opinions. Which is what most women would do.
But men? So long as someone laid out our clothes, put food and drink in front of us and serviced us with the occasional blowjob, we’d be content.
No, more than that: overjoyed by the peace and quiet.
(Just ask any married man.)
So next time someone asks you which sense you’d rather lose, sight or sound, answer “both.” You’ll be glad you did. Because, in the immortal words of Cat Stevens: “If I ever lose my eyes, I won’t have to cry no more.” Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Dale
Hi. If you’ve made it this far, you probably liked the story. So why not check out some others at my Medium page? https://medium.com/dear-dale
