Why do I hurt people?
Dear Dale:
I’m a nice guy but often do bad things that hurt people. Why is that?
Signed,
Behind blue eyes
Dear BBE:
The conventional wisdom is that you don’t love yourself. Somewhere along the line, someone did something bad to you — your dad drank your beer or your mom stole your smokes — and you came to the conclusion you’re a bad person undeserving of love.
And so you act out, perversely attempting to prove them correct by coughing in their face, crapping in their gym bag or hacking their account to post porn on their Facebook page — all the while hoping someone will see through your shenanigans and love you despite the bad things you do.
Nonsense. Truth is, you’re an asshole. You enjoy hurting people.
(We all have a bit of darkness in us. Some more than others.)
But, instead admitting it, you make excuses for yourself: “I’m a nice guy. Just misunderstood.” Bullshit.
And, deep down, you know it. Deep down, there’s a little voice that insists on telling you the truth. About that and so many things.
Like the porn you look at. You say you’re just curious about leprechaun S&M but really, you know better. And so does Google.
So what to do? The solution is simple: embrace your inner asshole. Only by admitting the truth about yourself — that you are an incorrigible scumbag with no redeeming qualities whatsoever — can you overcome this conflict.
Don’t believe me? Just ask Luke Skywalker. Remember that scene where the hero, Darth Vader, invites him over to the dark side? Unfortunately, like most kids, he ignores his dad’s advice and loses a hand as a result.
(Like Jim, my co-worker, who made the mistake of using the tree-trimmer with his eyes closed. Well, that’s what you get for being a show-off.)
So forget all this foolishness about being a nice guy. You’ll be glad you did. Because not only will it free you up to be the asshole you were born to be, you won’t guilty about it. It worked for me. It’ll work for you too. Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Dale
Hi. If you’ve made it this far, you probably liked the story. So why not check out some others at my Medium page? https://medium.com/dear-dale
