Race and Religion
A real-life experience with my race and how it affected my mindset with religion.
💡This post is not to offend anyone. I’m just sharing my experience from my brown eyes💡
I remember when I was in high school, a thought came to my mind. I wondered why god made me look the way I do. My features are different, my hair thicker and my lips full. I couldn’t understand why, since god created everyone, he didn’t make everyone look the same. Why was my hair so hard to comb? Why was I constantly called ugly?
I kept seeing so much trauma and hell in my community that I couldn’t understand why god didn’t help us. So what did I do? I conformed to society’s standards. I made myself artificial.
Now, mind you, I received my first perm at five years old. My 4c hair was so hard to manage out of all my siblings. However, that was the standard of beauty in my community. So, the hatred for my appearance started early on and manifested as I got older. I needed to have straight hair. I wanted to look…different.
I wondered how religion played a part in my thought process. With religion, I didn’t see images that resembled me. Wait, I stand corrected. I remember one character in the Bible that looked similar to me, and it was Satan. There were black images of Satan. So imagine seeing that and saying I’m black. That can mess up the mind.
However, I needed Salvation, so I gave in because I didn’t want to go to “hell.” There was something that I noticed, though. In religion, there is segregation still. There is something called the Black Church. Now, why is that? I think it’s to keep people in a state of hope for a better tomorrow while suffering in poverty.
I’m trying to be careful with my words because as I write this, I’m emotional because of the trauma that religion caused me. I sometimes wonder if certain life events play out purposely so I can start asking questions. I’m not sure, so I digress.
However, religion plays a massive role in the division of humanity. It keeps people in control and gives people a sense of hope.
But religion, in my opinion, has made the world worse. We can’t get along because hatred and racism still exist in 2023. I mean, aren’t people tired of the same rhetoric? Hatred and racism don’t work, but it destroys. I am not seeing the world become better, but it’s getting worse. It’s pretty heartbreaking because I have children who will go on in this life when I’m just a vapor. I have a slight ability to make the world a better place for our children to do better.
So, as we get closer to 2024, I’m not sure what the world will look like. The only thing I’m sure about is the present moment. So, I strive to make every day count and be the best. I know every day it won’t be roses, but I have learned to forgive myself. I am learning that I don’t have to express every thought that comes to mind, and I don’t have to believe I’m wicked because someone told me so. There is life outside of religious doctrine. I am finding it little by little, and I hope you are finding it as well.🙏🏽❤️
