Satan’s Kinda Disappointed in Me

I’ve only chosen to eat babies once or twice a millennia…and I haven’t gotten around to it yet.

I would keep the air conditioning on in the winter, if my family didn’t complain about the icicles forming inside the house.

I look both ways when crossing a one-way street. Even a stray car couldn’t hit me.

I work hard to accomplish goals, instead of selling my soul to be good at them.

I take the opportunity to help others, even when it won’t benefit me in any way.

My taste in music has changed from heavy metal in my youth to a more softer alternative rock, in my late 30s.

So, needless to say…

…the Prince of Darkness is pretty upset with me.

It’s a shame that I don’t believe in him.