Which Well… Well, Which?

searching for perfect
that doesn’t exist
but the longing is there
in the place it was missed
“what could’ve been” be-
comes “never will be”
someone was impatient
with “just wait and see”

she failed her own test
she broke her own rule
instead of the empress
she embodied the fool
she never deserved
to be held like a toy
though play is her game
she must strive to find joy

good for a moment
enough to believe
though it was fleeting
it was welcomed-reprieve
but the place where it starts
is a gash in her heart
and she thought he was smart
of the still broken part

she’d entered the well and
she’d almost climbed out
and he threw her a rope
when she started to doubt
the strength that she had
to summit the ascent
and she let down her guard
for he said what he meant

but she later found out
in the hole that she fell
she had opened herself to
a deep wishing well
“so what, then, of trust?”
she needed addressed
“was this self-inflcted
or under duress?”

the one way to know
was to climb it again
this time, with no one
but the spirit within
into the mind
among haunting thoughts
a maze of “he loves me”
by “forget-me-nots”

to not be a victim
she’d surrendered the praise
that she felt she had earned
on the darkest of days
but no one could see
from the depths of their well
and before very long
it was clear as a tell

she’d avoided the top
cause it shone very bright
and it’d been quite a while
since she’d seen a real light
so all of this falling
was really a ploy, cause
she wanted belonging
like the wish of a toy.