Guaranteed Basic Income (cynical remix)

Paco Nathan
Jul 4, 2016 · 4 min read

WIP research, based on notes from the original proposal that was presented by world-renowned activist shareholder P. Turteal on December 12, 2019 during opening remarks at the State of the Union Address sponsored by Nonserto.

First off, grateful to POTUS and Congress that this historic referendum could be implemented by an industry consortium of concerned employers, endorsed by voters and media last month during our general election on November 5th, and overwhelmingly supported by the public. Thereby preventing what would’ve otherwise certainly been a major economic disaster to have the Federal government fund the previous unfounded notion of providing a Universal Basic Income.

At age of majority, young adults must now choose among three tracks: college, vocational, or consumer school. Subsequent military service may be combined with any one of those tracks for additional benefits, given an honorable discharge. As an aside by Turteal, there’s a personal hope that university admission rates can be reduced dramatically.


Let’s unpack this: think of how much a company such as Coca-Cola must invest for development and broadcast of an advertisement during a major event, e.g., the Superbowl. Or the national conventions during Presidential election years. Aggregate those staggering advertising costs across the Global 1000, plus their lobbying investments, their PR expenditures, PAC/voter constituency budgets, adding the costs of their shareholder relations. Even with a 65% buy-in across the base of companies in category, how much Guaranteed Basic Income could that aggregate of annual operating expenses serve to finance?

Tens of millions of citizens, funded for the rest of their lives. Consider that current unemployment levels in the US is quantified at less than 9.5 million. If the top 500 companies in North America created a pool, they could fund nearly 20 million consumers plus their families for less than $400 billion per year, after factoring out the illegals. While that price tag may seem staggering to some, consider the upside: a pool of firms could directly manipulate nearly 20% of the US population.

A large portion of the required funding for this program will of course be channeled through reinsurance buy-back, since rates subsequent to implementation will drop substantially for a vast majority of public ills. Low-hanging fruit, ranked roughly in order of annualized costs:

  • hospitalization subsidies
  • unionization (and resistance against Automation Economy in general)
  • company costs of unemployment filings
  • commuting during peak hours
  • crime levels encroaching on wealthy urban neighborhoods
  • consumer litigation (liability insurance)
  • product backlash in social media
  • homelessness removal during major sports events or tech conferences

This becomes a kind of “New Deal”, and a renegotiated Bill of Rights specifically for consumers, optimized for corporate interests and major political parties who have endeavored to provide the funding, to make the pie higher for all. This is in our wheelhouse.

In practice, AIs will orchestrate crowdsourcing for consumer demand, to offset costs of peak usage for food, utilities, transportation, etc.

Supporting contract law for the new program is based on a nascent legal theory of conscripted empathy.

Case Study: suppose someone dies in Atlanta due to E. Coli served in a salad that was purchased by a consumer at McDonalds. It’s of course unfortunate, but it is what it is. In response, two million people throughout North America post on Facebook that “It was just a fluke, sad, but hey let’s go buy more McD’s now” along with photo bombs posted of them buying a small meal for their friends during a check-in at a local McD’s. Because that’s their job, for the rest of their lives, with retirement included.

Wouldn’t say that we’re necessarily picking cherries, there will be some difficult trade-offs for implementation.

Benefits offered to Consumer class:

  • $15,000 per year basic income per adult, less for their children
  • free housing/utilities/food/transportation/telecom
  • health/vision/dental/mental insurance
  • immigration visas for spouses
  • cannabis dispensaries (share with friends and family)
  • premium (social) media packages
  • travel and entertainment opportunities

Professional obligations of the Consumer class:

  • must sign strict NDA with proven non-disparagement clause, plus arbitration agreements
  • waive all rights to public criticism or litigation against participating firms
  • mandatory geolocation 24/7 via their choice of implants or wearables — to track EM, ensure NDA compliance, etc.
  • most won’t get to live in high-demand areas: SF, NY, etc.
  • their kids may not be able to attend a university (mandatory lower tier admission priorities)
  • hard to shift to a salary position given a consumer education
  • family will not inherit individuals’ savings or other accumulated capital wealth
  • no need to ever really “retire”
  • probably won’t ever own a home, etc.
  • must not do during peak times: commute, dining, etc.
  • unlikely they’ll ever be allowed to hold elected office
  • mandatory tasks: crowdsourced augmentation, keeping the “person in the loop” for large-scale commercial AIs
  • required participation in child care services, community event volunteer support, disaster relief, etc.


"In the loop…"

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