Analyzing Impostor Syndrome as a new ux designer
Many years of rigorous experience of working from smaller to bigger projects has made me a tough person. Or at least that’s what I thought before I took the hard decision — after working 15 years in the Interior design field — to become a UX designer. The transition was non-linear but not strenuous. Not every day was the same, not all the work was the same and not all the people I met on the way were the same. And despite all odds I was confident to break through in the new world of “Human Centric Design”. Until at one point I got caught in “Self doubt “, the feeling of not being good enough.
Imposter syndrome is the term I first heard when I was trying to understand how to address my situation. It was an uncharted territory for me, till I felt subjected to it myself. Undoubtedly it had definitely affected me at many stages of life — without me recognizing it — and I usually avoided the situation and kept going. Just recently I dug deeper into the subject and realized that there was a lot to be known.
So what is Imposter syndrome?
The term itself was coined by Dr Pauline in 1971, to describe the self-perceived intellectual phoniness in high achieving women. The term ‘Imposter Syndrome’ has since become part of the common anxiety vocabulary. The fear of doing all erroneous or not having adequate skills for your job that you are hired for. The constant self doubt of “if you have done enough” or “if you are good enough”.
Stress has a dubious characteristic to devour all the energy from a person and put one in self doubt. All types of creative professionals are subjected to this experience every once in a while. When I spoke about my feelings in my design team, everyone openly shared their experiences and I received a lot of encouragement to accept these feelings, keep my spirits high and I would eventually get over my negative emotions. The emotions got healed and when I was back to myself again, I wanted to gain a deeper understanding of how imposter syndrome affects people in their careers. To understand the empathy with the subject I interviewed four different design stream people and attempted to find empathy around Imposter syndrome.
Description of the 4 Interviewees.
My interviewees were four different design discipline people with different levels of experience in their respective roles. From our discussions I drew three conclusions which I summarize below:
Problem
“ I am still doubtful and confused and still constantly doing better.”- Interviewee1
“ It impacts seeking validation from my peers, especially my plus ones with our coach and colleagues. in product environment ask question and validate things.” - Interviewee2
“I feel like I m not doing enough and I need to do more sufficient things also.” - Interviewee3
Many said that the problem of self doubt starts when you start a new role or move to a new company. With new roles and responsibilities, one has to understand the task and get settled in it. It requires time and constant support from other people in the team and company especially when the pressure of the outcome is more than understanding the task. One couldn’t understand if one is doing the right thing. There emerges a constant need for validation at work.
“This type of syndrome happens due to competition in the field and everyone has pressure to want to do well and no one gets the opportunity to do so.” — Interviewee4
In a junior role, this is more related to pressure from the market, where they have to produce better and instant. The constant pressure of producing results rather than getting time for reflection or advice puts a lot of pressure on where the problem of Imposter syndrome occurs.
Effect
“It takes a lot of time and a waste of time to overthink it. — Interviewee1
“Feeling that things out of my control that I am lost in process and it usually experiencing high doubt on my own capabilities, feeling of powerless.- Interviewee2
The effect will be draining the creative energy and wasting a lot of time of self assessment. Thinking about the past and leaving aside the present & the future. The point of departure where the normal situation gets out of control and one starts doubting every step of life’s decision. This is no longer connected with office work but one also feels the effect in personal space at home. Their social interest and personal time also gets affected.
“When I was under that feeling, I was working super hard on mental and physical health. My personality and confidence level was affected to some level . I was under the impression that I was not understanding enough. I was burning out. I can’t manage properly .It was not manageable to come out. — Interviewee3
“Some people try to learn things someone breaks down and are not able to do that.- Interviewee 4
Sometimes people overcome with the feeling of Imposter syndrome by themselves however the effect does not fade in a day. The feeling of failure and doing one’s best consistently puts pressure on the thinking process. It is also visible on their health where eating and drinking gets affected.
Solution
So what is the best solution to avoid the situation? In my interviewees’ viewpoint, you can’t avoid the situation as we are working in a co-dependent work environment, where we all collaborate towards a common goal. We can only accept & overcome the situation. The best solution advised was to talk and speak your mind out.
“I asked for help with lot of courage first of on first ashamed at first or the question is lame — Interviewee 1
Discuss with your supervisor, mentor or manager when you are caught in this situation. Don’t be ashamed to discuss and express your doubts. In the process you will learn new things or get help to resolve your doubts. Also with experience and time you will get mature enough to deal with most of the self doubt situations. With time comes experience and maturity levels to deal with difficult scenarios.
“I think it is good to express doubt from time to time when certain expertise defines where it is necessary to express. Doubting is healthy because doubting pushes you to go extra to challenge yourself to do your best. — Interviewee 2
“It is important to integrate in a new company or in a new project and clarify the exception and keep it in that box. Talk to your superior and manage your doubt on a continuous basis.. — Interviewee 3
“ I am mentally prepared this time, nonetheless the intensity is not high. — Interviewee 3
Final thoughts
After these conversations, I don’t believe there’s a simple cure for impostor syndrome. But my thinking towards this syndrome changed from drastic to cordial. Also important to be kind to oneself, and don’t be stressed out in the process to heal. I overcome these situations and hope this research will help more to seek the right help to get over their insecurity and anxiety. Last but not the least, I encourage you to talk to someone about it. I guarantee you aren’t the first person to feel this way. And don’t forget to provide support to those who are dealing with the situation alone, they needn’t deal with the situation alone. I leave you with this thought to reflect on.
“I came, I saw, I conquered.” — Julius Caesar
