What BTS Taught Me About Websites That Rank

Recently discovered BTS. Did not plan to. Do not “identify” as ARMY (pls don’t test me). But I watch Run BTS to reset my brain, and my Spotify thinks I’ve been body-snatched. I cheer when V does CELINE, low-key tracked the “military’s over” headlines, and still replay J-Hope killing it on stage at Lollapalooza.

For the “not my thing” crowd: seven dudes who change hair like app updates, move in metronome-sync, occasionally grab the UN mic, and plot twist: one of them (Jungkook) sang “Dreamers” at the 2022 World Cup. You’ve heard him, even if you couldn’t pick him out of a lineup.

Also, better eyeliner and skin than mine. I’m fine.

Then my marketer brain did the thing: Oh! This is how a website should work for any brand! Seven distinct roles, one coherent story. Let me show you.

Let’s Jump: BTS as Your SEO Team of Seven

RM: Your Canonical Voice (website copy that leads)

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RM is the spokesperson, the compass, the guy who can brief the UN and the group in the same breath. On Monday, he’s in a suit, telling teenagers to “speak yourself.” On Wednesday, he’s on Run BTS, accidentally body-checking a lamp because the God of Destruction woke up. By Friday, he’s “Namjooning” through a museum…