Of Scrolling and Social Lives: Changing My Behavior to Emphasize Active Online Socializing
Background: In the pandemic world, much of my social interaction occurs online. Meals, walks, and nights out with friends have been replaced with long Zoom calls, virtual baking sessions, and online game nights. For me, planning and participating these online activities has the byproduct of a great deal of time spent each day scrolling through my messages or Instagram feed with no real intent of responding to most of them. During the day, I respond primarily to confirm virtual plans or set up phone calls (what I call active online socializing), yet I spend several minutes perusing the messages coming in or scrolling through my feed (passive online socializing). The first apps I open after picking up my phone are, most often, Facebook Messenger or Instagram:
Goal: My goal this week was to cut down the amount of time I spend in passive online socializing. I’ve noticed how perusing my messages or scrolling through my Instagram feed always makes me feel less fulfilled and more anxious. In contrast, even one active socializing activity — such as a video chat with a friend — reenergizes me, improves my mood, and reduces anxiety. These observations align with researchers’ findings on social media and mental health.
Method: Every time I opened an app and proceeded to socialize, I tallied the incident (similar in principle to a “swear jar,” where each slip-up costs a small amount, but I tallied for both active and passive socialization). I hoped that a growing tally in the passive column would deter me. With each tally mark, I tried to identify and record my primary motivation for engaging in socializing (i.e. Was I taking a break after a long period of work? Was I expecting a message? Was I bored and acting out of habit?).
I sought to mimic the variable-interval reinforcement schedule that social media uses to play upon human psychology by recording as and when incidents occurred, instead of at fixed time intervals.
Models: Using my notes on motivation, I drew a connection circle for my triggers to begin engaging in socialization, passive (red) or active (green):
I also wanted to be particularly mindful about the relationship between my anxiety levels and productivity when passive socialization is injected into the mix:
It’s apparent that passive socialization feeds this negative feedback loop, whereas (from my observations) the best way to break out was to engage in active socializing (i.e. make a phone call) or, in the absence of that opportunity, simply busy myself in another task like homework.
Reflection: I’m glad I took the opportunity to consciously measure a habit that I’ve long suspected negatively affects my mental health. The most important takeaway for me — which I realized through drawing the feedback loop — was that passive socializing not only increases my anxiety but also directly impacts my productivity and, in turn, my fulfillment. If I were to repeat this exercise, I would add ways to reward myself for limiting passive socializing to see if incentivization contributes significantly to behavior change.
