Don’t spend money on motivation, it’s inside you!
5 ways to do introspection in the time of crisis
Stay positive, practice life and stop giving money to the Happiness Industry
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.
- Plato
First things first: This article is not intended to bring happiness into your life. There’s a distinct difference between introspection and happiness. The former being the search and the later perhaps is the result, when you work on improving your present. I am not against attending yoga classes or purchasing self-help books. All I am saying here is, you need to dive deep and self-audit before understanding what makes you happy. That search is on your own. There’s no science involved in introspection. No need to spend money on the so-called “Happiness” when you are trying to understand what’s inside you and what you want from life. It’s the search and the acceptance. Sometimes acceptance of your search result can make you happy. Introspection is like a light. Do you think it’s been a long you haven’t used that light to search into your dark and dusty mind attic? Read on!
We are in a time of crisis. The 33rd President of US, Harry S Truman once said, “Men make history and not the other way around. In periods where there is no leadership, society stands still. Progress occurs when courageous, skillful leaders seize the opportunity to change things for the better.” Now we know that the opposite is also true. Men create hazard too by his indomitable greed. Irrespective of the pandemic epicenter geolocation, scientists and government agencies are of the opinion that it was either man-made or man-spread.
We are social animal and it’s not easy to disconnect with people in the time of crisis. For many, self-isolation feels like being in prison. Thankfully we have the power of knowledge at our fingertips! We are so used to internet that we have been taking the access to unlimited knowledge for granted. As days moving into weeks, emails seems to be redundant and stresses of daily chores started to weigh in. Our always on-the-move lifestyle started complaining about difficult dream pattern and having the fear of not getting enough done.
Historically, we tend to self-introspect when an extreme situation like death happens to our close one. If you have friends or family suffering from Cancer, you have seen it first hand. The fear of death, the fear of not living life enough is not new to people with life threatening diseases. This isolation from dear ones while being sick are making things worse. You must be coming across a steady stream of articles on patients experiencing trauma and deathly situations in isolated hospital beds(thankfully most of them are recovered to tell their tales). These articles give you another reason to be thankful, to be alive for today.
I had a near death feeling about 12 year ago, on a cloudy morning, when my rented car in India turned turtle after the driver (yes, in India you hire the car with a driver, if you are wondering!) fell asleep on the steering after having a night shift the day before. It was as bad as it can be as my 4 year old son witnessed the incident as he and my wife was traveling in the car that was following us. The door was crashed open and my head got dragged on the concrete road for about 10 feet causing a torn auricle (outer ear). It took me time to shook off the memory but I can vividly remember what I was thinking in that few seconds while being upside down and feeling terrible pain.
I know, you must be thinking “Is this about introducing you to a near-death experience and telling you a story of introspection or introspection in general?” You are not wrong! While researching for this writing, I realize, the introspection is often not genuine if you can’t take yourself out of the situation and put yourself in an extreme. Just like the painters who often distance from their painting to assess how much more to finish, your self evaluation is perhaps incomplete if you can’t take your inner you and place it outside your skin.
Think about it! This pandemic situation has put all of us into a panic situation. Even if you are not thinking or talking about the glum scenario around the world, you are panicking. And that’s completely natural. But what we do next is not natural and perhaps you could do better. Without just thinking This too shall pass, and dive into binge-watching your favorite show, you can utilize the time to look into yourself and understand what is that matters most. If you are thinking, this too is becoming one of the pages from your favorite self-help books, think again!
This pandemic situation will drive many of us to think over our life in a different light, some will find it difficult to handle and will take professional help, some will head to the self-help section of the B&N and some will find the easiest way of all, dive into the dizzy fantasy world of narcotics. What you choose to ease your pain is up-to you, but all I am saying is, there is a better way to audit your situation and improve upon it.
Back in 2008, the self help industry was valued at 11 billion dollars each year. And in 2016 alone, the US spent 446 billion dollars on medications — almost half of the global market.
Shelves are full of talented writers writing about happiness without experiencing its depths themselves. Creative marketers and advertisers sell individuals the images of happiness. Instead of trying to solve a problem at its origin, people are finding ways to fix it, result being a vast population of lost, depressed and anxious individuals.
In 1766, Jeremy Bentham was eighteen years old and created something that changed the way our generation would perceive “Happiness”. He created an extensive and hugely influential doctrine of government: Utilitarianism.
This is the theory stating that the right action is whichever one produces the maximum happiness for the population overall.
Most of the books or teachings that you’ll see around you talks about Happiness being the ultimate goal of introspection. The question then arises: Is happiness the most important goal we should all strive towards? Perhaps. But, what if we consider the discourse of happiness scientists, then we must remain critical.
I am not against happiness, but against the so called ‘good life’ that the science of happiness preaches mostly. Helping people feel better is a commendable intention. That goes without saying. But pure self introspection without guiding yourself towards betterment is different from “Happiness”. As Edgar Cabbans mentioned in his book Manufacturing Happy Citizens, our reservations about happiness are based on four main critical concerns: epistemological, sociological, phenomenological and moral. So whenever one tries any of the self-help method, in most cases they try to validate their understanding. To introspect is to accept your present situation. Not validating your happiness score.
How can introspection help?
Just think! Pure, unaltered thinking! Not about the book you read, not about the movie you watched. Not about your son’s college education, not about your friend’s car, not even your retirement money. Just think about yourself! I can poke your brain a bit with the following points:
1. Much of what you consider important is actually totally inconsequential
How many things we do simply because of social convention — because we’re worried about what other people will think of us, and how much do these things really matter? Think of your worth. The job you are doing today. Will your company stop the position or hire someone new? Perhaps it’s the later and that too sooner than you can expect.
To take yourself out of the context, it’s important to use a mirror. Leave your inhibitions and stand naked in front of the mirror. Yes, being naked is a very important thing. This is you, the one with the nature. Pure, un-distilled and raw. Look at your body closely as if you are seeing someone else’s body. As if you are seeing someone else’s dead-body. Try to find fault. Try to find beauty. Whatever it is, this is you. You can not change this. At least in next 7 days. This is what you have been given by the creator and this is how you have taken care of it. This measures your success or failure. This is everything. Once done, don’t forget to dress up. Please!
2. At the end of the day, only relationships matter
In all the company I have left in search of a better opportunity, I have left a parting which more or less says the same thing: “It’s not the money or the position that matters! End of the day, it’s the people and the relationships that makes the memory.” This is true in every damn aspect of life.
3. Don’t underestimate the importance of financial security
Check your bank today. How much money you have. Don’t think of 401K, don’t think of how much money you are going to get when you sell the house. Just cold hard cash. How much you have? Just think of it. That’s your worth. Why not calculate intangible assets like social respect and social standard? Aren’t they assets? No, for the time being forget those. You have 7 days left to leave alone. Social status doesn’t matter.
4. Don’t underestimate the importance of travel
Take a look at your car’s odometer! Yes, please go outside. Hopefully your car is not far away that you can’t check now. Please go and check.
Now write down the miles on a piece of paper. This is your Journey. Give some time and try to think, where were you at 0 mile? 500 miles? 5000 miles? Think of all the beautiful things and places you have visited with your hard earned beauty. Remember everything. It’s important to travel for you to change your vision, to see the beauty, to understand the nature, people, culture and many many things. Hope you realized, unlike the first two, this one is a bit metaphorical.
5. Stay humble, be grateful, keep learning
This is eternal chicken soup for the beautiful soul. For everything! Be grateful that you are able to read this, be grateful for the food, be grateful for the shelter you live in. Be grateful to your parents for raising you and guiding you. Be grateful for who you are today. Be even more grateful for who you are not today! Stay humble because for some people your presence still matters. One of the greatest side effects of staying humble is you are able to learn more. These two goes hand in hand. A grateful mind is a learner’s mind. It always absorb more.
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That’s all I’ve got for now. It may sound a bit cliched and lack of profundity — but that’s because life’s basic truths are straightforward and simple. Just stay afloat, this too shall pass!
