Day 127 or “The Day I Fall Asleep in a Restaurant”

Still no sleep in. Even when I explain to Stormy that I stayed up late to root her tablet so I could install more games for her isn’t enough. The subsequent conversation on rooting devices doesn’t help.

We decide to have a quiet day. Nothing too strenuous. There’s a children’s play-gym near our house where kids can pretend to be doctors, police, hairdressers or run a supermarket. So we go there after breakfast. I’m feeling a little guilty about not being as attentive to Stormy as I should be, so I promise myself that I won’t look at my phone while we’re playing. The next 4 hours are really, really, hard. I don’t know how parents coped before smartphones. However, the extra attention is insightful in it’s own way. I discover that I play wrong. Or more accurately, Stormy takes pleasure in pointing out that I play wrong. Especially pirates. I don’t know how to play pirates.

My favourite quote of the day: “I’m Captain America, but…”, she changes to a hushed voice, “… as a police man”.

We only emerge because I’m so hungry I’m about to pass out. We head downstairs and grab Japanese Udon for lunch. Stormy has her usual Zaru which she eats. Slowly. One noodle at a time. At some point I literally fall asleep in my chair. Stormy wakes me up when she’s ​ready to leave. I almost wrote ‘when she’s finished’, but we both know that is a lie.

I convince her that we should go home and watch a movie. All part of a cunning plan to nap on the sofa for a few hours. My plans are ruined when, as we near home, she see’s the pool. Now she just wants to swim. 3 hours later she finally emerges.

At this point I just can’t be arsed so I order McDonald’s for dinner. Not the best parenting, but the best I can do at this stage. After dinner, and the usual nightly routine, Stormy refuses to go to bed. She sits on the floor beside me and won’t tell me why. She just keep looking sad. I eventually coax the answer our of her — she’s scared. I do the only thing I can. I carry her to bed, sit beside her, and teach her the litany against fear. It seems to work as she’s now asleep.

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