Into the Gray
Dedications page because one line is just not enough to explain who inspired me in life.
This book is dedicated to the lost souls, the lovers gone astray, the siblings losing communication, the generation that brought me to be.
It is dedicated to all my past lovers — ex’s — haters- friends- family ( in terms of loyalty — blood means nothing to me) and my loving cat.
Most of all it is dedicated to Kay who is somewhere up there in the world looking down on me with her smile.
Prologue
Outline- Eminem
I can always kick the grave
A songbird’s cry as its wings get eclipsed by puffs of cloud,
Disaster abound as feeling washes away the soul like soap cleanses the body,
Knives are quick, sharp, and fast
as sorrow delves deep slowly,
it seeps under our skin, paralyzing us into shoe boxes,
The fight of lions has no merit to prove what is right or just here,
Just as sorrow has no wish to prove a battle against happiness.
We are the lost here.
That day is a vibrant nightmare in my head still as I write these words sitting on a creaky old bed with the smell of must around me. You know that saying ‘follow your heart, and you’re heart will guide you right.’ Yea. I suggest you follow the life of logic or else you will end up like me inside a room with no heat, and sitting lonely with only the sound of a ticking clock to drive you mad.
I write these words knowing not a single one of you will understand true commitment until you give up everything for the one you thought loved you.
My nightmare is like a punch to the ribs making you shiver as you try to shed off the memory before rolling over and trying to shut off your eyes except you can’t. The image is stained on you’re eyes like someone drew it in permanent marker. So, let me recount to you how my life took me from having hope, happiness, and all those butterflies and crushing them into mush because of just a single guy. One single person can have enough power to ruin everything, and everyone you know. You may say only if you let it but is a choice really a choice?
A stench of wet sludge, leaves, critters, and scurrying worms wafted into my nostrils bringing with it a whiff of garbage from a passing eighteen wheeler truck. Aaron’s knuckles clenched around a rusted ratchet as his emerald eyes twinkled from flickers of radiant frosted light. Trickles of sweat slid down his face as he gritted his teeth like an angry vulture.
It wasn’t supposed to be a tumble down a hill like Jack and Jill. Fumbling along with momentum till you’re too dizzy, and can’t uncurl you’re body due to agonizing pain. Except at the bottom of this hill rests a corpse rotting from slight crawlers of the night making an eyesore in such a vibrant forest. Trees swayed teasing a dazzling sapphire above with their long branches casting shadows around. Creatures flurried about in rouge, dirt, and dull green leaves making a fairly lively scene if you were a nocturnal owl.
A twinkling shovel bent against a thick brown oak tree. I tried to wipe away crystalline drops but their as sharp as a lone iceberg in the middle of the ocean. Daniel was a good kid, a great best friend, and a person I invested everything I couldn’t give Aaron into. He was one of those children who got spoiled for simple achievements, treated like a king, and could pick up girls like Danny Zuko from Grease.
One of our favorite quotes from the movie for him was “Well you know, these girls are only good for one thing.” Silly, I know. He had these tiger like sapphire eyes like the winter sky that could freeze women on the spot. Heck, my feet were pretty solid on the ground for him a few times.
Aaron’s hands let the ratchet slip from them making a clanging noise as they hit a rock. He hesitated before reaching for the shovel to start digging till the sky changed a multitude of colors, and the sun burned our eyes as dawn approached.
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