Hurling Myself Into 2023
I haven’t felt this positive about a new year in quite some time.
The last time that I stayed up until midnight on New Year’s Eve was in 2017 going into 2018. I was living in Texas and went dancing with a woman I was dating, and we had a fun evening.
Since then, life has been far more challenging and my enthusiasm for the new year has waned considerably.
I have worked New Year’s Day for the past few years as I teach ESL online and teachers are often needed on the platform on major holidays, but this year New Year’s Day fell on my day off — Score!
Despite having nowhere to go on New Year’s Eve (being transient makes it difficult to make a good circle of friends or even date for that matter), I decided to stay up until midnight and see in a year that I am finally feeling good about.
A little backstory
I recently made a big decision. It’s time to leave my little oasis of London, Ontario, and move toward where I’ve wanted to be for a while, Calgary, Alberta. It wasn’t an easy decision and it may not be received well by my housemate who welcomes my rent payments for the six months of the year that I’m home, but I need to start moving forward in life.
Whilst London, and my little basement apartment, have been the perfect place for me to lick my wounds after an incredibly difficult few years, the city has a very “clicky” culture and the locals are not particularly open to allowing others into their established groups. Without a car in a city where you need one, breaking into circles and attending events has proved quite difficult.
Calgary is a much larger metropolis with a good public transport system, and based on the comments from Calgary residents on some of my Facebook groups, seems to be a far more inviting and welcoming crowd, so…
Alberta here I come!
Going into 2023, I felt slightly exhilarated having made this momentous decision. I long for honky tonks, neon signs, cowboy boots, and country music, so choosing Calgary as my future home wasn’t at all surprising.
Due to my visa status in Canada — I’m merely a tourist at present — I will still have to leave in early March and travel for six months before returning, but when I do, I plan to drive my belongings across this big and beautiful country to my new city.
The backstory explained, let’s return to New Year’s Eve.
I queued a bunch of new movies on my TV, settled into my couch with the last of a batch of the Christmas Gluhwein and some gingerbread cookies made the day before, and kept an eye on my laptop to check the status of friends who were progressively reaching the new year before me: Australia, Turkey, Germany, South Africa — they all rolled into midnight before I did.
I watched the ball drop in Times Square on YouTube before I knelt in front of a special candle gifted to me by a friend, and lit it. The label which read…
home
[hom] nouna feeling, not a place
… resonated deep within me as I prayed for a permanent home this year. My travels, whilst amazing, are wearing on my soul and I’m weary of the constant transience. I need a home, a community, and the opportunity to build something permanent.
I need a place to call my own.
I sang Auld Lang Syne with the help of Megan McKenna and raised my eyes to the dark sky outside my window as I asked two of my lost loves to help me get there. I shed a few tears as the song always tugs at my heart in remembrance of my godmother, but I felt liberated.
It was as if the pain and difficulty of the last five years were releasing themselves from my psyche.
I should also mention that I’m a big believer in numerology. Along with other modalities that I call on to get me through difficult times, it has kept me focused and hopeful.
Every year is a new personal numerological year for each of us based on our month and day of birth, combined with the numbers of the current year. You can calculate your own here.
We move in cycles of nine years and 2023 just happens to be a personal year one for me, which is, coincidentally, the beginning of a new cycle. This, along with my Calgary decision and the fact that I will be turning fifty this year, has contributed to the inkling that 2023 is going to be life-changing for me.
New Year’s Day didn’t disappoint
I recently joined a spiritual community — which I desperately needed — and they have been more welcoming and kind than I could have possibly wished for. I headed off to the Sunday morning service and was greeted with the same warm and loving energy that I usually am.
The talk was entitled Release and Restore, and we were given instructions on how to let go of things that no longer served us. Afterward, I chatted with those that I look forward to seeing each week, and one of the members who is becoming a great friend, brought me some veggie lasagne that she had cooked for me the night before.
That small gesture (for her) meant a great deal to me. Abundance is something that I’m focused on attracting into my life and that slice of lasagne represented abundance.
As I had borrowed my housemate’s car, I hurried home, stopping to get him a coffee as I usually do whenever I borrow his car. Normally, I just walk into my local Tim Horton’s as it’s quicker than the drive thru, but yesterday I chose to stay in the queue of cars as I was enjoying the music flowing from “The Highway” on Sirius XM.
The car in front of me seemed to have a long order including a few special requests so it took forever for me to inch far enough to give my order to the floating voice at the end of the speaker — a Timmies medium double-double, my housemate’s drug of choice.
I didn’t mind the wait — the familiar twang from some of my favourite country artists keeping me company as I sang along to the hits emanating from the car’s radio.
When I finally got to the pay and collect window, I was informed that the gentleman before me who had taken such a long time had paid for my coffee as an amends for taking so long.
I couldn’t believe it — what a lovely gesture, and yet another overt offering of abundance.
I thanked the cashier, smiled broadly, sent up a prayer of gratitude, and beamed all the way home.
As I settled into my couch for an afternoon of Sunday football, a dear friend called and we chatted for about forty minutes. She was stranded in Virginia, waiting for a part for her van before she could continue on to Florida and then across to California. We spoke about meeting up in Mexico which is where I plan to head in March, and she affirmed all of my new choices, lovingly listening to the amazing day I’d had and allowing me to gush with happiness over my new decision.
My entry into 2023 has been beautiful thus far and as God is my witness, I plan to keep it that way.
It’s going to be a big year.
I’m turning fifty, moving to a new city, and will be making new friends and finding new opportunities. I’ll be hanging out with some old friends and finally meeting some new ones face-to-face. I’ve made some decisions about the direction of my writing which feel right—and all of this in one year, numerologically.
I haven’t felt this positive about a year in a very long time!
Onwards and upwards! To infinity and beyond! Viva la resistance! And any other rebel yell you can think of.
