Partners in Crime

Julia B.
Digital Workshop
Published in
4 min readNov 10, 2015
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Friendship; a term used to describe a positive bond between two or more people. Well that’s the formal version. In my opinion, friendship is spending time with someone who you love and have fun with. As we mature, we need friends that we can trust in order to survive. That may sound a little far-fetched, but I personally need someone to talk to about problems or significant moments that make me feel something. It doesn’t matter what that something is, but as long as I can talk about it, I always end up feeling better.

As I move on in my life, I’m starting to understand the difference between best friends and friends. This seems to change as I get older. The different stages of having a best friend are as follows

  • Kindergarten-Second grade: Anyone who comes up to you and is the same gender (otherwise you’ll get cooties obviously). This will be start of your 4 month friendship. In the beginning, you’ll spend every minute of every day together, you’ll play together and your mom will be organizing playdates every weekend. Over time you’ll both find new friends and repeat the process, but there’s always that one friendship that you’ll always come back to.
  • Third-Sixth grade: This is the year, you’ve decided to grow up, be more mature (you are nine). You walk into your classroom with a great big smile on your face, looking around and seeing everyone with the same expectations, same idea and same goal. Your looking, and searching, and you see them. The person who will be your absolute favorite person for the next few years. You walk up to them and find out their name, the name that you’ll be writing in crayon along with “+Julia =BFF”. Years of sleepovers, shopping trips and lunch time recess, you feel like an expert on this person. Thousands of inside jokes, embarrassing moments and secrets later, you are the pair everyone wants to be. This is usually where something terrible happens. You have a massive fight, one you can’t recover from. The most terrible thing that can happen in a friendship happened to me. She moved 8,084 kilometers away from me. That doesn’t mean our friendship is over, this friendship is forever.
  • Seventh-Eighth grade: This year , after recovering from a bad breakup (from your best friend), you go into the school year miserable. For me, feeling as if I had no one was the worst feeling I have ever had. Something I forgot to mention before, I lost not only one best friend, but two. People coming at me right and left asking stupid questions such as “Do you miss them” or “I heard Stephanie got a new best friend. Do you feel jealous” and the absolute worst “Did you cry when they left?” Of course I cried, of course I miss them and no I’m not jealous. Over the course of the years, I found new best friends. They’re both amazing and I love them, but of course I’ll always miss my best friends. I’m only in eighth grade now, so I can’t speak for ninth grade on, but I know that I’ll always have amazing friends to get me through it

Something tells me that I will always have friends. No matter how long they last. Although sometimes your friends aren’t being true to you. This makes a huge contribution to teens being depressed and unhappy. With girls especially, being fake can hurt someone’s feeling, even if it is unintentional.

Girls tend to lie or smile when they don’t like someone in order to not hurt their feelings. This can hurt even more because you may think someone likes you until the stabs you in the back. Nothing hurts more than thinking your friend is real but then you catch them trash-talking you. It makes you feel insecure and depressed when you find someone who seems very nice and kind on the outside, but will tell all your secrets and fears to anyone who mentions your name. Even I admit I have said some bad things about people behind their backs, and I regret it. We can all be a little harsh sometimes and we usually end up losing a really good friend who trusted you. It’s a terrible thing that happens and it really affects some people badly. They can end up depressed or just become very upset and feel betrayal. Sometimes they can hurt themselves or worse depending on the type of bullying they experienced. This can all be prevented. You never have to love someone, sometimes people just don’t click together.

Sometimes people can be just plain mean. You can’t escape it. You are always going to put yourself at risk of feeling upset when you make a new friend. Some things just are, some people don’t think of you when they do things for themselves. You can end up feeling neglected or unwanted or betrayed, especially if they break a promise. But moving away from that topic, friendships are a great thing to have. People share secrets and they become lifelong friends by spending so much time together. Friends are people who you can share special information with and also someone you can count on to make you feel like you can always talk to them, day or night. Friends are people who make your whole day better.

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Originally published at inspirationstartshere.wordpress.com on November 10, 2015.

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