Imposter! I Am My Own Worst Enemy
In my last post, I went into detail about being a self taught programmer in a coding bootcamp. But there was one detail that I left out and I thought I’d dive deeper into the subject here. In short it’s the ‘Imposter Syndrome’, a term that I have started hearing a lot lately among other students that have been through the bootcamp.
By now it’s no secret that I’m a bit over prepared for the bootcamp. Some other students even commenting that I should already be looking for employment. But as of yet, I haven’t started my job search. Do I have the necessary skills needed to go out into front end development? Maybe, but I still don’t feel like I do.
And that brings us here, I am working to gain confidence in my programming competence. But I also want to write about my struggle to hopefully give motivation and inspiration to all aspiring software developers.
How Much Is Enough?
One of the best things about programming in general is that you don’t have to know everything. You only need to know enough. The problem however is what exactly is enough? My bootcamp instructor made the analogy that learning programming is like constantly drowning. Just when you feel like you reach the surface, the water rises. And I can attest that this feeling never really goes away.
This analogy can go into any skillset. As an example, we’ll take solving a rubik’s cube. At first you have no idea where to start and look up instructions. The first solve is all based on following directions, but with practice it becomes ingrained in muscle memory. And once you feel comfortable in this skill, you look into the world and see others doing the same. And this is where the imposter syndrome settles in. As you venture out, you will see impossible records being broken all the time.
Programming is quite similar, the more you look around, the more you will find that you don’t know. And the amount of things you don’t know always seems to grow.
Knowing Yourself Is The Beginning Of All Wisdom
That’s a quote from Aristotle, and he’s right! The solution is introspection. Instead of looking outward, look towards your own growth.
Whenever possible, I try to remind my classmates of how much they’ve learned in such a short amount of time. In the last month, we’ve gone through python, html, css, javascript, bootstrap, sass and json. As well as several mini projects. Even though they feel like they’re struggling, they each have a firmer understanding of web development than most programmers, myself included, in the first month.
Basically what I’m trying to say is that if you see great progress in your abilities then you are enough. And with that, I’m starting to believe in my own competence.
