the specificities of you

09.19.2024. flash poem

the case of us,
is that the way we have come to know one another
is as unique as the way we communicate.

the emotions of the last three months
would be enough on their own
to draw two people together.

but in the case of me,
i am drawn to the specificities of you.

i decided to write some out —
four, and then another four…

one. bravery.
the most important quality for me in a partner
is someone who is brave,
who has the courage to live life on their own terms,
who isn’t held back by convention or worrying too much,
and is happy to chart their own path when they need to.

two. a steady hand to keep bravery and other energy in check.
or to use your turn of phrase,
a real rider.

three. how we communicate.
i don’t need to explain it here,
but i want you to know
that it’s like nothing i have experienced before,
and the art has sustained me
during many difficult moments
and healed something deep in my mind and soul.

four. your music.
i want to be with a creative person,
as there are so many experiences
that only people who are creating all the time
seem to understand.
and for me, shared creativity has opened up
deeper ways of knowing you.

the other four…

one again. a strong sense of who you are.
i don’t know all the details of you yet,
but i can tell from what i do know
that you are confident in yourself,
and have a vibrant life already.

two again. acceptance of my mental illness.
the fact you engaged with me as a whole person
even when i was in a mental health crisis
is a level of meaningful that is very hard to put into words
and made me feel deeply seen.

three again. how safe you made me feel.
we met in a huge storm,
and the way you conducted yourself then
made me feel extremely safe.
it was not something i expected at all
to feel energy like that and also safety.

four again. spontaneity.
from the beginning,
there has been a spontaneity and humor
to what we have shared,
from the t-shirts to the video games
that has shown through in the quieter moments,
and at times even in the difficult ones.

there are more,
but i wanted you to have these.

we’re not just two random people
who found some wild connection at midnight.
that may be part of our story, sure,
but even at this time in things,
we already share a whole lot more than that.

on my end,
i feel a lot more than that about you,
and i wanted you to be sure of that.