How to Get Away with Assault
The hospital is the only place where powerless people have power. That’s what a doctor told me, early in my nursing career. I remember feeling amazed at how poorly I was being treated. “I am here to help, so why are these people so rude,” I had asked.
Once, a patient’s son said “thanks” to me for bringing his mom a sandwich after she cursed at me for not bringing it fast enough. “You don’t need to thank him,” she scolded him, “that’s his job.”
Patients scream at us, throw tantrums, and purposely poop on the floor. (For real. That actually happens a lot.)
I’ve been assaulted. More than a few times. One time, a man attacked me with such malice that it ended with a bloody dog-pile on the floor while another nurse held her hands on her head and screamed “DAVID!!!!” out of terror.
What happens if you attack a police officer? At best, jail, right? Maybe they’ll scuff you up a bit first, too.
What about a teacher, accountant, or salesman? Or a McDonalds employee? Jail.
What about the lowest, least-respected person you can think of? Still jail.
If you attack pretty much anyone — you go to jail. You can’t just go around battering people.
Except a nurse. If you assault or batter a nurse, nothing happens. Maybe because you’re in pain. Or maybe you were having a crisis. Or maybe you’re really sorry after. 🙄🙄🙄
No matter what your reason is, nothing will happen. Maybe it’s because the hospital doesn’t want a lawsuit, so they don’t want to make a big deal about it. Maybe it’s because it happens so often, the nurse just shrugs it off and moves on. Maybe it’s because the police don’t think it’s a big deal. (A cop once told me, “yeah, but…didn’t you sign up for this?” and then refused to make a report.)
Plus, “the customer is always right,” right? That phrase has been drilled into our heads.
The world expects employees to take the brunt of rude and aggressive people and respond professionally. They want us to just accept being threatened, assaulted, or physically attacked; they’re the customer, so we can’t possibly risk offending them, right?
But that’s not right. Sure, there is a time and place for professionalism. For instance, if you’re in customer service and a customer is upset about an unexpectedly high electric bill, you can’t just start screaming and cursing back at them. Being the “bigger person” and being professionally calm while dealing with them is appropriate.
But if they start to beat you up, all bets are off. You’d expect the customer to be banned by your boss and them be taken to jail by the police. You’d want the world to have your back. And it does. Unless you’re a nurse.
“Do you get trained for this?” my brother asked me after hearing one of my many stories. “Trained for what,” I responded, “martial arts?”
Actually, kind of, yes. We are required to obtain a certification in a course that teaches us how to defend ourselves. Why? Because being assaulted is expected.
But instead of actually preventing it, they just expect us to deal with it.
They could hire more security guards. They could support us and file charges when we are assaulted. They could set the standard that we are not punching bags for the powerless to feel powerful. They could do that. They should do that. But they don’t.
Turns out, it’s us who are powerless.
David I. Mancini is a Registered Nurse and a Licensed Paramedic. He’s a tech enthusiast, world traveler, and an eclectic eater. www.davidmancini.xyz
