Forget Balance, I Choose Harmony

rachel mcgowan
Do The Good Stuff
Published in
3 min readDec 29, 2016

Buzz-words, buzz-words, buzz words. They’re everywhere, aren’t they? They’re not inherently bad. In fact, they’re used so often because they have impact. The impact just happens to be harder to find the more buzzwords are used and the more diluted they become.

‘Balance’ is one of those buzzwords. Beautiful in theory, buzzed away into oblivion. Whenever we take on new things — projects, jobs, workout routines — balance becomes a key phrase. People ask, “How will you balance it all?” and we usually spout off something about self-care or motivation and quietly wonder what ‘balance’ even means.

What does it mean? When we talk about life balance (over and over again), we’re usually referring to the way we manage our time and energy. A balanced life is meant to be a healthy life, so we see people who work “too” much being held “accountable” to “work-life balance.” People who spend “too” much time on a new hobby are held “accountable” to their “professional priorities.” People who make big decisions about their lifestyle are being held “accountable” to what everyone else deems reasonable.

Balance.

The way we’ve adopted this word as a society focuses too much on external circumstances and expectations and too little on what’s actually best for the individual. So it’s time to propose a new word to be the barometer of how healthy we feel about our lives. Balance has hard lines and set expectations. You know what doesn’t?

Harmony.

The word ‘harmony’ settles a little nicer amidst our schedules, commitments, and individuality. Harmony focuses on the way that the pieces of our day play different important roles, and weave in and out in beautiful ways. Harmony focuses on the cadence of our inner selves; how we feel while we do all the things we do.

The beautiful thing about harmony is that everyone’s looks different. Our unique needs and circumstances help inform our harmonies so when we focus on finding harmony rather than balance, there is no set standard that we have to compare ourselves to. *Deep sigh of relief*

How do you know if you are striving for balance instead of harmony?

Your answers to these questions might help you find out:

1. Look at your daily commitments. Do they make you feel successful? Or do they make you feel content?
2. Write down your purpose in life. Your mantra. Your passion. Now write a list of the things you are currently spending your time on. Do they align?
3. Reflect on the last few big decisions you made. Were they made based on your core values?

Balance is measured against a time map and a success flow-chart; harmony is measured against what we value and how we feel. Focusing on a harmony helps you validate the different seasons of your life, the natural ups and downs of your days; focusing on balance pits you against a set of impossible standards. Harmony is less of a buzz-word and more of a life style.

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rachel mcgowan
Do The Good Stuff

a creative with a love for people, good coffee, acoustic music, stories, feminism, and anything that is not typical dinner conversation.