Getting in on the act

I’m Getting Into the Tariff Business

It seems easy to do, very lucrative, and I can be as random as the next person

All you need is a cardboard display and a large permanent marker to make millions. Perhaps billions. Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash

I’m busy forming a company called “Tariff for Uve Inc.” and will heretofore be levying tariffs against a variety of situations, Governments, corporations, and individuals, where clearly needed.

With no time to waste, here is my list of retaliatory tariffs against the USA:

Calling the USA, “America” as if there are no other countries on the continent that count, 200%.

Editor’s Note: From here on, where I say “American/America,” I mean USA.

I am placing a 50% tariff on Americans who pronounce it aluminum when in fact it is aluminium.

I am placing a 35% tariff on all American’s who inject Trump into the conversation as if the rest of the world gives a shit.

I am placing a 100% tariff on Americans who enter a social media portal and brag that America is the greatest or has the best army, when the reality is that it has not won a war since Russia and the UK won WWII for them. And it is not the greatest in any sense of the word.