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I’m the Annoying Girl at the Party

Some say I’m annoying, but I say I have quirky charm

I have pick me energy! Photo by Abstral Official on Unsplash

Hi! It’s me — the annoying girl at the party. You probably heard me before you saw me, shrieking about my love for really dry chardonnays while showing off my new bra near the cheese plate, “I GOT IT AT NORDSTROM RACK!” Yeah, I’m loud and obnoxious, and I overshare. I also drink too much because it makes me fun!

But I’m not here to apologize. I’m here to own it and explain why I’m the chaotic force of nature that you will try to dodge at every party ever.

I treat every party like it’s my coming out

I don’t care if it’s a Dancing With The Stars watch party or a Hoedown. I’ll enter like a soap opera villain, toss my coat on the nearest chair, and shout, “OH MY GOD, GUESS WHO I HOOKED UP WITH!!” to anyone who will listen. Then I’ll make a beeline to the bar and pour myself a double of your most expensive tequila. Every party is my event. My runway. My Met Gala. I need attention!

I bring the gossip nobody asked for

I live to dish the dirt! I also live to dish it loudly so everyone can hear, “DID YOU HEAR JODI GOT A NOSE JOB!?” You do now. Even if it’s not true…