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HERE’S HOW

Stupid Shit Activities You Do Daily. It’s Time to Stop!

Be the change I want you to be in the world

Michael Burg, MD (Satire Sommelier) 😬
Doctor Funny
Published in
4 min readOct 6, 2024

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Except readers who ardently wish to read on and be enlightened 😃 Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash

We all do them. Stupid activities we do daily that need changing, RFN!

Here’s the roster that would, and could, and should change if only everyone saw the world as I do …

… correctly.

💥 Stupid Activity — Toilet paper use

I know this one is controversial. That’s why it leads the list.

But, hear me out.

If Fido bends a biscuit on the rug what do you go after it with? Dry paper towel? Of course not, that would just smear the shit into the carpet fibers.

So why do you chase after your own poo remnants with dry paper? Sure you’ll get most of it wiped away but some brown will remain in town no matter how many times you swipe at it.

Instead, borrowing a page from the chemists’ handbook, remember that “the solution to pollution is dilution.” In short, use water to absolve you of all your dark sins. Squirt, wash, and dry like the high-tech Japanese do. Or, install a low-tech little hose of your own beside the toilet. Or, try a wet wipe.

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Published in Doctor Funny

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Michael Burg, MD (Satire Sommelier) 😬
Michael Burg, MD (Satire Sommelier) 😬

Written by Michael Burg, MD (Satire Sommelier) 😬

The “MD” & “um” in Medium, and the “er” in wisenheimer | Doctor Funny editor/czar | Sultan of satire | Party Pooper - Mostly on Trump's party

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