The measure of a New Jersey man
What Is Your Snow-Shoveling Personality Type?
Ranked on a spectrum from indifferent to anal with data points in between
It snowed in Central Jersey for the first time in three years. Mind you, we don’t count accumulations less than two inches that we just kick aside with our shoe.
The snow day protocol is always the same:
1. Wake up and check how much snow is on the ground,
2. see if it’s still snowing and
3. if the result of 2. is positive, crawl back in bed.
From this point the routine varies from home to home depending on the Snow-Shoveling Personality Type (SSPT) of the household shoveler, typically the male. (No offense females — it’s an unwritten clause in the marriage contract: “I carry your progeny for nine months, you shovel the f’ing snow.”)
Once the mutually agreed-on community shoveling time starts (first fool goes out, collective guilt takes over), garage doors open one after another and SSPTs go on full display.
The pragmatist
This type uses flawed logic to avoid being a real Jersey Man.
