Yes, We’ve Seen the Email
Where once we had Good Morning or How Do? or Wotcha,
With smiles and questions about the weekend,
We are now met with Have you seen the email from…?
Sometimes before we’ve even sat down.
Sometimes before we’re even through the door.
Have you seen the email from…?
And of course we haven’t,
We’re just firing up our computers,
And telling them where they can stick
The updates they’ve been proposing for the last fortnight.
Have you seen the email from…?
Is such a clever way of telling us what we ought to be doing,
Without telling us what we ought to be doing,
Even though, if you think about it,
If we really ought to be doing it,
We’d be doing it.
Each Have you seen the email from…?
Infantilises us, because that means it has been read before we’ve read it,
And we’re now invited to play the game
Guess what my reaction to it was…
And all in the first five minutes of Monday morning.
So, each Have you seen the email from…?
Really should be met with the only other one-liner
Indicating precisely how important the message is
And where it ought to come in any sane scheme of things.
Each Have you seen the email from…?
Ought to be responded to with,
“Yes, and it’s already been deleted.”
