10 Ways to Fuck Someone (Over)
Lessons from Fucking, Loving, & Everything in Between
1. I’m sorry I ran out like that.
It was my first time and I was embarrassed how fast I came. I was just a boy then and didn’t know what else to do. I was eager to experience sex. I rushed into it and it turned out bad for both of us.
2. I’m sorry I turned you into nothing more than a tool for my own pleasure.
I used you to experience a few seconds of ecstasy. I don’t remember your name. There was no connection, there was no intimacy, just a boy that wanted to cum.
3. I’m sorry I didn’t ask you how you felt.
I wanted you and you wanted me. We had amazing sex for hours…but after awhile my dick started to hurt. The only reason I kept going is because I assumed that’s what you wanted. But realistically, your pussy probably hurt too.
4. I’m sorry I didn’t have the courage to end our relationship.
As you kneeled at my doorstep crying in the rain, my heart ached for you. I was ashamed at the pain I caused and wanted that pain to go away, for both of us. I picked you up and carried you inside. I knew that I no longer wanted to be with you, but I wasn’t strong enough to remain steady in my decision. I wanted to fuck other people. But I couldn’t say that then, so I lived a lie for awhile, slowly distancing myself from you, watching you break piece by piece.
5. I’m sorry I led you on like that.
It was just sex, for me at least. I knew you were catching feelings, but I told myself the lie that you knew we were just having fun. I ignored the subject until you couldn’t take it anymore. You made me feel good; I made you cry. We haven’t spoken since.
6. I’m sorry I didn’t know what I wanted.
I felt something for you — you were smart and thoughtful. We vibed. It was dope. We had awkward sex a few times and that was cool too, but I realized you weren’t the person for me. I told you straight up and ended our relationship clean. I respected you.
7. I’m sorry I tempted you.
I knew you had a man, but I didn’t respect it. I pushed and pulled you into being with me. You fell in love. I fell in lust — with a new city, with new experiences. I wanted to fuck other people…I ended our relationship. Things got real. Pregnancy. Abortion. You seem happy now. I hope it wasn’t all just a huge shit show.
8. I’m sorry I was too eager.
We weren’t really a thing…even though I wanted us to be. You were way too sexy for me. We had amazing sex a few times and then I got jealous when you went hiking with that model — the buff Swedish Ken doll.
9. I’m sorry things were so confused.
I loved you…but not that type of love. You were a real one. That night we made out on the beach (the first time) is still one of my favorite memories. We had built up so much trust and love for each other that it just kind of happened. It all felt natural. And then we started having sex and things just got complicated. I caught feelings for a minute and then they went away. You caught feelings for a minute and then they went away. And we rode the edge between friends and lovers…until we didn’t. Until we both knew that we needed something more. I wasn’t playing games. I wasn’t in it for the sex. I was trying to figure my shit out. I cherish all the memories we created together.
10. I’m sorry I was shallow. I’m sorry I didn’t understand.
You are an amazing person, filled with life and curiosity. You hold a courageousness that allows you to bring your ideas into our world — an increasingly rare characteristic. You are beautiful. I just couldn’t see it then. As I struggled to love myself, I relied on you — you made me feel important. I couldn’t share that then; I couldn’t share you then. Perhaps you were struggling too, but not now. As I scroll through your Instagram, I wonder what our life would have looked like…if the man in your pictures was me.
11. I’m sorry I wanted you to stay.
We talked about it from the beginning and I knew it was a possibility. I understood your decision and gave you my full support, but I had this idea deep in the back of my mind that you might say fuck it and postpone your trip indefinitely…or at least long enough so that we might do it together. I loved you. I’m glad you left. I can’t think of a better adventure, a better opportunity for growth.
I share my deepest stories to show you that you are not alone.
We fuck up 10 times in 10 different ways before we even realize we fucked up. This is life. It’s complicated and difficult and exciting and scary. But this is what makes life beautiful.
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