The Dreaded IRS Letter

I've received too many

William Mersey
Doing Time

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screenshot by author (Here it is. The dreaded IRS letter minus my address to thwart stalkers.)

I can’t recall how or when I signed up for the service. But every morning, I receive digital images of the mail that will arrive in my snail mailbox in the afternoon. And what you see above is what I saw this morning. Talk about ruining a guy’s day.

Obviously, even the most upstanding taxpayer gets an adrenaline rush when he or she sees that correspondence. But when you’re a guy who’s had the IRS come to his door with a search warrant, been billed for money paid (or seized in my case) on no fewer than three different occasions, and been overcharged in mid-five figures on a completely different matter, seeing a letter of this nature will either make me shit my pants or have a coronary.

Even if the IRS has made a mistake, you cannot imagine how many phone calls and/or meetings it takes to rectify an obvious error.

Well — because today is Hurricane Day +1 (even if there was no wind or damage in the area), my faithful civil servant (in the form of a letter carrier) didn’t arrive with the mail until 5 PM.

In the meantime, you’d have pissed yourself watching me enlarge the postal image — trying to see through the envelope — and even holding a mirror up to my computer to aid in reading the backwards handwriting.

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William Mersey
Doing Time

Daily Beast, NY Daily News, Daily Mail, Independent contributor. "In all matters of principle, it's the principle that matters." Just call me "Dollar Bill."