The Ostrich System: Trump’s Plan To End Covid-19 By Not Finding Out Who’s Got It
By David Grace (www.DavidGraceAuthor.com)
On Saturday, June 20, 2020, Donald Trump told the 6,200 supporters who trickled into Tulsa, Oklahoma’s 19,200 seat Bank Of Oklahoma Center:
“You know, testing is a double-edged sword. We’ve tested now 25 million people. Here’s the bad part. When you test, when you do testing, to that extent, you’re going to find more people. You’re gonna find more cases.
“So I said to my people, slow the testing down, please.”
On Monday June 22, 2020, Mr. T tweeted:
“Our Coronavirus testing is so much greater (25 million tests) and so much more advanced, that it makes us look like we have more cases, especially proportionally, than other countries.”
Little children often think that everything in life is symmetrical, that if they can’t see someone that the other person also can’t see them.
When playing Hide & Seek, my friend Lyla’s niece, Tanya, would immediately cover her eyes, thinking that because she couldn’t see Lyla that Lyla couldn’t see her.
Lyla would play along and say things like, “Where’s Tanya? Where did she go?”
Tanya would giggle and then peek between a couple of her fingers and Lyla would say, “Wait, I think I see her” and Tanya would hastily cover her eyes and again magically “disappear.”
Of course, eventually Tanya realized the falsity of this strategy.
By the time children reach kindergarten almost all of them learn that the things most likely to hurt them are the ones they cannot see, that covering their eyes will not make threats disappear, but in fact, not seeing evil will make it even more dangerous.
Sadly, the President of the United States has not learned this lesson. Or, more likely, he’s learned it, but he believes that his base is so stupid, so brain dead, so besotted with his cult of personality, that, like little Tanya, its reality has escaped them.
As the man George Will calls “The Malignant Buffoon” stated in Tulsa, his new plan for combating Covid-19 is to stop discovering how many people have the disease. His child-like logic is simple:
- Fewer tests mean fewer cases of Covid-19 will be reported.
- Fewer reported cases of Covid-19 will mean that the disease is dying out.
- The more the disease dies out, the healthier the country will be.
- The healthier the country is, the better my chances of being re-elected.
- Therefore, to get me re-elected we must stop finding out how many people are sick.
If Captain Evil’s Ostrich System actually worked, then with the stroke of a pen we could eliminate cancer, heart disease, diabetes, and virtually every malady known to man. All we would need to do would be to stop identifying who was sick.
Soon the number of reported cases would fall to zero and the disease could be reported as cured.
And, of course, the same Ostrich Strategy could be applied to every other problem that plagues humankind — hunger, violence, homelessness, war, unemployment — the list is endless, and the simple cure is always the same:
Make the victims invisible and, just like Tanya playing Hide & Seek, as soon as our hands fully cover our collective eyes, all the bad things will just disappear.
I wish that if every time the Shameless Snake tweeted or appeared in public I could just cover my eyes and make him disappear.
How great it would be if that actually worked.
— David Grace (www.DavidGraceAuthor.com)
