Men Who Do Chores Get Laid More
Simple as that. 🍆
In the first episode of the new Netflix series “Easy,” comedian TJ Jagadowski tells his wife: “If I was doing less laundry and less dishes, I would be having more sex.” Jagadowski backs this up by mentioning a study that found couples that are more “gender normative” have more — and better — sex.
The study he’s talking about is probably this one, published in 2013 by the Juan March Institute, a research center in Spain. Researchers found that when men did certain types of chores around the house, they got laid less often. What types of chores resulted in less sex for these guys? Chores that people often consider to be traditionally feminine — like laundry, cooking or cleaning.
Maybe that’s true in Spain, or maybe the institute — and the writers of “Easy” — are just a little out of date.
“One of the big problems with this question is this idea that the chores are the wife’s job since the husband already has a ‘real’ job which pays the bills,” Dov, an independent artist, told Dose.
“That assumption is ridiculously out of date since society and economic pressure has made the stay-at-home wife a rarity.”
I decided to conduct a little research of my own. I threw the gender aspect out entirely, since the people I interviewed weren’t all in heterosexual relationships. Here’s how they answered the question: “If your partner does more chores, do they get more sex?”
Michelle
HELL YEAH. If my partner does chores to help me out, I’mma have more time and energy to help them out! 😉 If they’re going to be in a relationship with me, they contribute. I am not the mama, the breadwinner, and the maid all wrapped in one. I have ZERO PROBLEM taking care of things on my own — You either ADD to my life, or you aren’t in it. Simple.
Tova
Absolutely. It shows a level of consideration and respect, that you’re helping out. As someone who travels a lot, if I come back home and there’s dinner cooked and I don’t have to worry about cleaning right away, it’s something I truly appreciate and I’ll show my appreciation for.
Also when you don’t have to do chores all the time, it leaves you more time to do other things. But I also think its important to say you don’t have to do chores to have sex. There’s no quid pro quo. It’s a nice thing you can do, but it shouldn’t be an expectation.
Angie
No, he will get it whenever he wants because I’m into making him happy. There should never be deals struck to get love. Some women use their love/sex to force men to do things. A man shouldn’t have to cut deals with his mate. If it’s happening, I suggest people explore other options because life is short. Let that man love you in peace.
Dov
Doing chores to get more amorous attention will not get you more amorous attention. Doing chores only correlates with amorous attention when you do the chores because you do your share of the work, treating your spouse as your partner in life rather than as your caregiver or housekeeper. It’s the respect and consideration that gets you attention.
I would say yes but it’s NOT because they do chores. Instead, I would say that someone who shows greater respect and partnership to their partner is someone who would do chores without an expectation of something in return. It’s the respect that gets you the sex, not the chores.
Bei Bei
That’s not how marriage works. It’s not chore-for-sex, or vice versa. Or ‘you scratch my front and I scratch your back.’ In fact, marriage is not about you. It’s all about what you’re willing to give and do for your partner. If you are not both willing to give each other 125 percent, 200 percent and then some, you should both move on. Give each other the chance to find others who will.
Kelley
In the sense of “keeping score?” Definitely not. In the sense that extra help with the housework gives me a little more time to lay up in bed, rested and adventurous? For certain. I’ve been happily married for nearly 22 years.
You can see that some people said a partner who helped with chores was more likely to create an environment where sex was likely, but most took pains to point out that sex is not a bargaining chip. Based on my back of the matchbook study, you’re more likely to get laid if you help make your home clean and comfortable — whether you’re the breadwinner or not.
More recent science than the Spanish study backs this up. Research published in June by the Cornell University ecologist Sharon Sassler found that “couples who adhere to a more egalitarian division of labor are the only couples who have experienced an increase in sexual frequency compared to their counterparts of the past.” Couples that didn’t share the work equally had less sex, Sassler found.
That matches marriage advice I once got from someone who counseled couples regularly — a Native American tribal chief. When I complained about not getting enough, he asked, “Do you fold clothes?” I argued, “But I work all day, and pay all the bills.” His response was, “Even if you work all day, and pay all the bills … you fold clothes.”
