MUSK: There’s a 70 Percent Chance I’m Actually on Mars
Has Elon Musk been smoking blunts again? The Tesla chief tweeted today that he thought he might already be on the red planet, but he’s not sure.
“There’s a slight chance I’m already on Mars,” he tweeted. “Why else would I have claimed to have ‘funding secured’ for a buy out of Tesla at 420? That’s kind of a Martian thing to be announcing to the world, after all.”
According to the Tesla board, Musk is in Southern California supervising the rollout of the Boring Company’s new tunnel this December.
“Elon has been very busy here on Earth,” said Chief Operating Officer Timothy Macalvee. “But as we all would, Elon would love to travel in outer space some day.”
But others have pointed out that Elon Musk himself has claimed that the entire universe might be a simulation.
“What if he figured out how to manipulate the simulation and has already reprogrammed his environment to resemble Mars?” said video game analyst Scott.
Meanwhile on Mars, there was not much activity.
“I have not seen him,” said Martian Bleep Zxangon. “And I pretty much know everybody here on Mars.”
Then Bleep Zxangon climbed into a vehicle that looked suspiciously like a Tesla Model S, and drove away, with a passenger in the passenger seat who did look a bit funny. Definitely could have been Elon.
The smell of skunk weed seemed to linger in the Martian air.
Wait, is there air on Mars? We’ll keep you posted.
