What it feels like to setup a bitcoin mining rig — explained in GIFs.

Disclaimer: this is not a “real” setup guide. Just our anguish told.

You’ve accepted that bitcoin (aka “Magic Internet Money”) is a thing, and you’ve decided to jump on board. You hear that you can use these fancy computers to acquire said bitcoins. Who doesn’t want to basically print money? It can’t be that hard. Oh, my sweet summer child, you don’t fully realize what you’re in for.

So, you buy a shiny new mining rig…

You eagerly wait for your — ahem, expensive — package to come in. You spend the next few days refreshing the tracking code.

Woohoo! It finally arrives!

When you open the package however, you find an imposing machine and… that’s it. Wait, what?

After rummaging through the box, you realize that you’re missing something.

It could be a cord, the correct power supply, or even a rig rack — yeah, you usually don’t want them on your floor.

You order the elusive parts, and you wait. Again.

Finally, that last piece arrives and you gather all the things.

You ground yourself to something metal so you don’t short circuit your new toy.

That would be very, very bad.

You hope that you’re connecting the cables to the correct pieces.

Once everything else is in order, use a paper clip to jerry-rig your power supply, and at last…

You plug it into the wall without electrocuting yourself.

Seriously, don’t electrocute yourself. So far, so good.

After turning on your machine, you enjoy a nice blast of hot air to your face.

Resigned, you dust yourself off, taking note not to stand that close again which you will of course forget.

You jump onto your computer, ready to connect to the rig.

This should be the easy part. You stare a the screen blankly. After digging around the box it all came in, you try to find something to help.

Except there isn’t a physical manual.

Still, you need to figure out how to connect to the machine. It should be pretty easy to find on the network, you’d think.

So, you jump online instead…

You scroll through a shit ton of forum posts and sites, with information getting more convoluted as you go. You debate if hitting your head against your desk or the wall would be more effective.

You search for a guide to get you to the next step.

Eventually, you settle on one of several guides to show you the way…

You open a terminal and try typing in some commands.

Just... what? Sorting through trying to find subnet masks… or netmasks... or something makes your brain melty. There has to be another way.

You try to directly connect it to your computer instead but it starts beeping.

You think, “Oh gods, did I break this expensive ass rig?! Is it gonna catch on fire?!” And after several minutes of panicking, while the beeping drones on, you figure out it’s because it’s disconnected from the internet. Damn it.

You finally use your “phone-a-friend” option.

They (hopefully) take pity on you and tell you a way to do it since the beeping is irritating through the phone. In this instance, use brute force.

You realize that the answer is in front of you the whole time.

You hear your friend laughing on the phone at you. Thanks, buddy.

Eureka! It finally freakin’ loads!

Helllll yeah! Almost there!

Deep inside, you login and hope for a pretty and futuristic interface.

But by now, you know better.

Regardless, you start configuring some basic settings.

Name it something funnier than your router. Hopefully it’ll be nice to you.

You figure out what pool you want to join. Do you want more monies?

Or do you want to support the community? Or both? So many decisions! You signup for one, save your settings, and wonder what to do next.

But your rig starts ramping up and it sounds like a small plane.

You wonder what the hell it’s doing and start refreshing the page. You see an actual uptime!

At some point you fall asleep despite the jet engine in the other room.

It’s kind of comforting, though. “Passive” income, awww yeah.

You wake up and go back to your computer. Holy shit, it’s actually working!

The cash doesn’t really come out of the screen, unfortunately. But hey, you’re starting to rake in them bitcoins!

Just don’t open that electric bill. ;)

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