Want to Surrender Control? Walk A Puppy.
Several mornings per week I hike our property or take a three to four mile walk down our country road. I look forward to the time; it’s an integral part of my spiritual practice. I feel the benefit mentally and physically. Nothing brings me more peace than moving my body in the fresh air.
Today, I decided to take our eight month old Sheprador, Bodhi. I felt more pissed than peaceful bliss.
The morning air was no match for a determined puppy. A sly grin and those big brown eyes melt my heart as he looks up at me, proud to be by my side. But two steps further and the Taco Bell bag strewn along the side of the road has his full attention and my shoulder nearly out of socket.
Bodhi completed intermediate obedience training last month. He actually walks well on a leash; I just don’t give him the opportunity very often. We live in the middle of the woods and he has the run of our 19 acres. He gets plenty of exercise. But with the weather changing, he’s inside more and I figure a walk will do him good.
I’ve been at this yoga and mindfulness game for a while. As soon as the aggravation started, I saw it. I was aware of all of the emotions and sensations arising in me. It showed me how much I try to control every. damn. thing.
He’s a puppy. He’s doing what puppies do. And he’s a sweet puppy at that. Why am I so damn mad at him for being excited?
The thing about control is that it’s an illusion. We manipulate our surroundings to make them fit into a scenario we deem appropriate.
And when things are out of control, we get mad.
Or change tactics.
I tend toward anger first.
I’ve learned a lot about control (and my lack of it) this year. My mom is dying. But clearly I still have a lot to learn.
Looks like Bodhi will be going on a lot more walks.