Springtime shenanigans
Of the plaid persuasion
By Roman Sabella
Edinboro, Pennsylvania. Quite possibly the Las Vegas of northwestern Pennsylvania as far as entertainment goes, opens up to a slew of new possibilities as the weather slowly grows warmer. For the occasion, I compiled a list of the best things to do in Edinboro this spring.
1. Fishing in ‘Fake Lake’ (a.k.a Lake Mallory)
Contrary to popular belief, depending on whether you even wanted to know in the first place or not, you can in fact fish in Lake Mallory. Placed ever so aesthetically behind the Pogue Student Center, swing by with your supplies to catch some fish and then promptly release them because you know far too well water shouldn’t be that color.
2. Get lost on the cross country course
We have a cross country course? Why yes we do! Home to one of the smallest teams on campus, the cross country course is located behind the old towers and is your one way portal into the woods. Poor with directions and willing to risk it all in this game of Hansel & Gretel style roulette? Then bring a friend and try to remember to stay on the path!
3. Walk to McDonald’s because it’s not 20 degrees out
You’ve likely seen the peculiar yellow glow coming from across campus, well it’s definitely not a spaceship, I’ll tell you that. It’s actually one of Edinboro’s fine dining establishments and home of the “Big Mac” — a McDonald’s. With the weather finally reaching the low 50s at night, why not take a late night stroll only to realize that their ice cream machine is broken?
4. Go for a late night walk to see underagers on the run
Well the McDonald’s trip may have been a bust, but surely you can take in the sights at night. Listen to the sounds of complete silence and watch the moonlight reflect off fake lake, all the while avoiding the massive puddle that forms nearby with even marginal precipitation. Hmm, what’s that? Police sirens and some joggers? Unlikely, because they’re probably future cannon fodder for the police blotter found in news each week!
5. Ride a bike to class
It’s Monday morning and after miraculously snoozing your alarm for a combined hour and a half you realize you have about 5 minutes to make it from the Highlands to Compton. How ever will you achieve this? Why, riding a bike of course! Speed past your fellow compatriots at breakneck speed disregarding all rules of the road, meanwhile watching as they grumble and think to themselves “Man, I wish I had a bike right now.” Silly peasants, legs are so last century.
6. Take pictures with Angus like its freshman semester all over again
The statue. The myth. The legend. Standing at 12-foot-tall and weighing in at an impressive 25,000 pounds, Angus is quite the Scotsman. Why not take a picture to commemorate the yesteryears of freshman semester, when classes went no higher than the 200s and you had yet to feel the wrath of Van dining hall over long periods of time.
7. Go to the McComb Poolhouse
With the incoming heat comes the hot, sweaty days where you can’t tell whether you miss colder weather or are just having hallucinations from the bliss of wearing shorts. Well what better way to cool off than by going to McComb and taking a dip in the pool, and did I mention it’s free to students? Who would’ve thought that swimsuit would come in handy in a place known for its snow.
Can you think of any more stellar springtime events? If so, please tell me, because this list was a bit of a struggle.
