How to Support LGBTQ+ Students
In 2015, the Supreme Court made marriage equality the law of the land, and five years later ruled the Civil Rights Act of 1964 protects lesbian, gay, and transgender employees from discrimination based on sex. Because of the progress that’s been made to secure the rights of LGBTQ+ folks, many educators mistakenly assume that marginalization based on sexual orientation and gender identity is a relic of the past and they don’t have to worry about their queer students anymore.
To be sure, things have gotten better. The Trevor Project’s 2020 survey found that 86% of LGBTQ+ youth report having high levels of support from at least one person, which is encouraging. But ask any queer kid in school today and they will tell you that for every person in their lives who is affirming, there are others who are not. Of particular concern is the well-being of transgender and nonbinary students. State legislatures have introduced more than 75 bills in 2020 and 2021 that target transgender kids’ access to healthcare and participation in sports, which if passed could have devastating consequences.
I am closer to retirement than many of my colleagues and am definitely not as hip as I used to be. I don’t always fully understand the wide range of identities students today embrace. But just because I don’t understand doesn’t mean these identities are not valid. So, I have made it my mission to allow my students to educate me about all the different ways of being in the world. Here are some tips I’ve compiled, based on what my kiddos have taught me. This list is far from exhaustive, but it will get you started.
LGBTQ+ students appreciate teachers who:
● Honor Preferred Names and Pronouns
Some students prefer to go by gender-neutral pronouns or those that don’t correspond with the gender on their birth certificate, so it’s always helpful not to make assumptions. On the first day of school, I share my pronouns (she/her/hers) with students in my introduction. Then I ask them to make a video in which they introduce themselves and share their preferred pronouns and preferred name or nickname. I don’t have them present this information in front of the class because we have not had a chance to get to know each other and it may not feel safe yet. I study the videos and take notes. Then I make sure to address each student in their preferred manner starting on day two. As we build our classroom community, all students learn by my example how to address their peers.
Why is this important? We know transgender and nonbinary youth are at greater risk for suicide than their cisgender peers. Trevor Project’s survey revealed students who reported most or all people in their lives honoring their pronouns attempted suicide at half the rate of those whose preference was not respected. Simply showing students that you see them and acknowledge all parts of their identity can be life-giving.
● Have a Bathroom Plan
Help your school create a plan for bathroom use by trans and nonbinary students, if it does not already have one. The plan should allow them to use the restroom that they determine best reflects their gender identity and should not be dictated by teachers or administrators. I have heard stories of students not being able to use the restroom at school or having to sit out during PE because no one could decide which locker room they should use. Trevor Project data revealed 61% of trans and nonbinary youth were discouraged or prevented from using the bathroom corresponding with their gender identity, which can have a deleterious effect on their sense of belonging and well-being. If you want to help on this front but are not sure where to start, Gender Spectrum has suggestions for how to create a gender-inclusive environment in your school, endorsed by the American School Counselor Association, the National Association of School Psychologists, and the National Association of Secondary School Principals.
● Start/Get Involved with GSA
Sponsoring my school’s GSA is one of the most important things I’ve ever done as an educator. A Gay-Straight Alliance (also known as Gender and Sexuality Alliance) is a place where LGBTQ+ students can fully show up as themselves and feel like a valued part of the school community. In fact, GLSEN’s 2007 survey revealed queer students in schools that have a GSA report feeling a stronger sense of belonging to the school than students without access to a GSA. Acceptance matters, and can make a huge difference in students’ mental health. Queer students were more than twice as likely to experience persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness, according to the CDC, which can be mitigated by providing affirming spaces such as these.
Fortunately for my students, there are many affirming adults at our school, which is no surprise. GLSEN data showed LGBTQ+ students in schools with a GSA are more likely to report that school faculty, staff and administrators are supportive of their identity. If your school already has a GSA, consider asking the sponsor how you can become involved. Several teachers I work with have made a point to show up at our meetings to support our kids, and it means the world to them. If your school does not have a GSA and you’d like to start one, GLSEN has some resources to help.
● Understand the Effects of Bullying
The chart below is based on data from the CDC’s 2019 Youth Risk Behavior Survey. These percentages illustrate the elevated degree to which LGBTQ+ students experience bullying as compared to their heterosexual peers.
It is important for adults to intervene when we become aware of bullying and not just chalk it up to “kids being kids,” because the consequences can be deadly. According to CDC data, LGBTQ+ students were three times more likely than straight peers to have attempted suicide, and feeling bullied can be a contributing factor to suicidal ideation.
Because bullying is a broad-ranging issue, seek out resources to help address your school’s specific needs. You could start by checking out UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center’s suggestions or these from the American Psychological Association.
● Love Them
This is the easy part. You don’t really have to understand anything about gender or sexuality to show up and love your kids. My LGBTQ+ students have been some of my most important teachers. From them, I’ve learned that I do not have to be perfect or all-knowing. To create a safe classroom environment for them, I just need to bring an open mind and a loving heart — and they will teach me the rest.
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