Self-discovery and Education

A while back, I asked myself the same question numerous youths my age ask themselves — what’s this whole grand thing called life? What’s my goal in being alive? I’ve never really answered this question, but one thing became clear. That in these formative years, our goal is finding our goal. That the first few years of our lives involve piecing together a jigsaw puzzle portrait of ourselves — not how we look, but who we are. This is self-discovery.

This publication’s called Educere because it’s the word which education was derived from. Educere means “to lead out” — to prepare youths to grow into adults who can navigate the mysteries of adulting and life while maintaining a strong core of meaning. So it’s logical to assume that part of the journey of leading students out involves leading them in a journey into themselves. So: this article serves as a progress report on to what degree Singapore’s education system helps do this.

A theory of self-discovery

Before we begin, let me state my (flawed and incomplete but hopefully workable) theory of self-discovery. I think self-discovery is nurtured through a three-step process — experience, reflection and growth. Let me give you an example.

Say you just got into a terrible fight with your friend Jeff, who’s also your group mate for your school research project. Jeff hadn’t done his work, and you had done his parts for him. He then logged on 15 minutes before the deadline, deleted your parts, and wrote his parts on his own again. Without any regard for the quality of work he had written, you shouted at him, accusing him of “disregarding your work and disrespecting your effort”. Jeff gave you a blank expression, and walked away saying “he doesn’t care about the outcomes, he just cares about what HE’s done”.

Okay, sounds terrible. But just by having gone through this, you’ve not learnt much. In fact, if you stop here, all you’d be is an angry young kid who holds grudges and finds every way to accuse Jeff of being a terrible person.

Self-discovery is when you go speak to your other friend Tim about this. Tim asks — “how good was Jeff’s work?”, and “why do you think you were angry about this?”. And then, you have an “aha!” moment — you realise that you are extremely enmeshed in your work, and care more about the quality of your work more than the team’s output. You also failed to consider Jeff’s perspective on things, regardless of whether you agree or disagree.

From there, you grow. If you identified your weaknesses, improve on them. If you identified your strengths, you build on them. If you identified your insecurities, fears, you realise and identify that they influence the way you experience the world.

Okay, so experience, reflection and growth — how does our education system help us do these three things?

The Good

I’ve always been grateful to be in Singapore for my education because we’re always given opportunities to explore and get our hands dirty. Even since Primary school, I had chances to try out different things — from student leadership, to a large range of sports, to debating. In Secondary school, the list of options open to me opened up even more, with regular talks by speakers from various industries, enrichment programmes such as Model United Nations. And now in Junior College, the thrill has gone even further. There’s always a new opportunity open — be it in academics, personal development, or in service.

So, experience, check.

Reflection and growth wise, I think the system tries to encourage people to reflect on their experiences through regular growth logs, and discussions with teacher-mentors.

The Bad, part 1

Opportunities to engage in a large range of experiences which catalyse this process of reflection and growth are not necessarily equally distributed in Singapore. Students in some schools are given disproportionately more opportunities than others, which then hinders these other students from experiencing more, from which they can then reflect and grow.

Slogans like “all schools are good schools” are encouraging, though. I’m optimistic that even if “all schools are good schools” aren’t a fair account of the situation right now, they will be an important motto for schools to constantly strive to equalise the student experience. (though I’m assuming here that all school principals fully believe in this principle like I do)

The Bad, part 2

Sigh.

We need to talk about professions of passion again. About hand-crafting your portfolio so you experience not what you want to experience, but what you need to experience so you can become a doctor. Like trying to tint your mirror to look the way you want to look, while deep within knowing that what you look like on your CV is only part of who you are.

About doing things half-heartedly and not reflecting on your experience within it because what you did was merely a performance put up for future-driving purposes, not a growth experience.

Look, I’m not here to deny that we need to do things which will get us into the next best opportunity — a good university, a good job, and more. What I am saying, is that experiencing things fully could give you something even greater: a good life, where you’re doing something you’re passionate about which you didn’t think you would be doing. So, go on ahead. Feel free to use the rat race as an incentive to do more. But I think the rat race should not stop us from doing them well, doing them fully, and growing from them.

My solution to self-discovery in Singapore’s education system

I’ve gone through the cycle of overcommitting and regretting something I signed up for because I don’t have the time or passion to invest myself fully into this, which then hinders my experience and therefore my ability to reflect on it and grow from it. I thus pledge to regularly sit down and reflect on my experiences, be it through weekly reviews, talks with friends about commitments and life, and regular 360-degree evaluations with those I work with. So I can make use of all the good in Singapore’s education system while avoiding the pitfall of forgetting why I’m doing what I’m doing — to learn more about myself.

I’ve written this in other articles, and I’ll say it again. I’m an optimistic person, but I’m not optimistic enough to believe that education alone will solve all problems. It takes two hands to clap in the world of education — students have to change their mentality too. I’m not going to call this a systemic issue, because students have a lot more agency to delve deep in what they’re doing than they think. Even university admissions today focus on how much one’s learnt through their various experiences. And while you can make stuff up today, experience really shines through in the working world.

Maybe the world is fairer to those who are authentic after all. So take this pledge with me, to be more authentic as we experience things in our education system, and to construct this jigsaw puzzle portrait of ourselves. There’s no deadline to do so, there’s no incentive, but I think there’s something beautiful in knowing who you are.