You’re not the first person in your lineage to be queer

Comforting words to read today

“i saw the words “ur not the first person in your lineage to be queer” and it’s rocking me to my core. how many generations down the line did one of my ancestors feel the way i did, feel differently than i did and so damn queerly it was a crime? how many of us were there? did they have hope? did they find peace? i don’t know. at the very least, maybe i am proof their identity was never wasted. reincarnated.” — ravens-play-exy-too

There’s this concept that healed people heal people; hurt people hurt people. This quote falls in the former. I felt like a revelation that healed, once shared, is like that candle fire shared with another that warms us both.

I don’t often write about my queer identity. In fact, I don’t think I’ve openly talked about being bisexual here on Medium. The truth is, this identity and its associated discoveries were shunted to the side as I was trying to survive a space that only saw me as Asian, an identity that meant they were treating me as different or less than.

More than once I had tried to find a queer space that was supposed to be inclusive, to be told that I was deemed not queer enough, or just assumed to be straight because I am Asian. More than once, I’d been told to shut up if I was simply an ally and not a member. This told me two things. First, I can empathize with the concept that allies can sometimes come into a space and take over with a sense of saviour…