6 Ways to Build Self-Love
Tips to become a stronger (and better) person
When we build self-love and become stronger people, many of our relationship problems melt away because they were never really about our partner — they were always about us.
So here are a number of techniques you can utilize to build self-love:
1. Practice Gratitude
Realize you have nothing coming to you. The world owes you nothing, and your life and possessions aren’t a given. When you let go of that sense of entitlement and practice gratitude — to God and to others — you accept others as they are and you begin to accept yourself as you are as well.
2. Monitor Your Thoughts
Become conscious about what comes into your mind. Recognize that what you think about all that occurs in your life is actually a result of how you were raised; it’s not intrinsic to who you are. This shift in awareness leads you to see that your perceptions and the thoughts that come up for you are circumstantial; they’re not essential to who you are. Acknowledging that your opinions and feelings are rooted in what happened to you, rather than stemming from the core of who you are, puts a space between you and how you experience life. It allows you to let go of rigid stubbornness and beliefs, and opens you up to seeing yourself as independent of whatever arises automatically in your mind and in your heart.
3. Drop Perfectionism
The next time you get frustrated with someone for not doing things the way you want them to, take a step back and simply sit in that seeming imperfection. Allow it to exist. Become perfectly harmonious with that seemingly imperfect disharmony. This begins the process of softening yourself in relation to others, the world, and ultimately, to yourself and your own shortcomings.
4. Get Physically Active
Living the couch potato lifestyle progressively leads you to feeling dead inside. Instead, boost your sense of self and zest for life by maintaining an ongoing regimen of physical activity. Get the blood flowing, get healthy and fit — and feel alive and good about yourself as you push through your natural limitations and resistance.
5. Drop Comparisons
Stop looking over your shoulder at what others do, have, and how they look. You have one hand to play — and that’s the one you’ve been dealt. Dare to be great by letting go of what you have no control over. That’s completely out of your domain — and it therefore has nothing to do with you. Live authentically in the moment by focusing in on what you can do now, and let go of the rest.
6. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone
Personal growth often means living in a way that doesn’t come naturally. It’s your refusal to recognize that there is an alternative way to respond to others and to your circumstances that makes you feel stuck. Rather than the path you’ve been conditioned to travel, try doing the opposite of what comes naturally. It may seem counter-intuitive, but I think you’ll be surprised by the results you get when you travel outside of your comfort zone.
